Kamis, 30 April 2009

Round 2

The Bruins play on Friday night at 7:30. For at least the next 4 games I know what I’ll be doing. I have my team, they have their mission and it’s all scheduled out ahead of time. Things are pretty simple for fans if your team is still in the fight.

However, if you are a fan of a playoff team that was ousted recently your situation is a little more complex. Here’s how you unlucky fans should proceed:

Sharks fans
Take comfort in the fact that the Ducks were no run-of-the-mill 8th seed and they are getting picked by some to advance past the Wings. When that doesn’t work go outside. Everything tastes better when it’s 75 and sunny. Make sure to invite Andrei Nikolishin to the bbq. He knows a bunch of hot chicks.

Flames fans
I thought this team was going to go far. I can’t imagine what the Flames fanbase is going through. If you are a Calgary fan you should probably spend your time ripping into Mike Keenan or Kipper or Dion or Jarome or just wait it out until the rodeo comes in July. Root for anyone but Vancouver.

Columbus fans
You guys have nothing to be salty about. Take pride in the fact that your team reached the postseason and lost to what will most likely be the Cup winner. I have no idea who you should root for maybe Lebron and the Cavs? I dunno. No snark here – that was a good 2008-2009 campaign.

Blues fans
Another fanbase that can still sleep at night. Start looking forward to starting next season with a healthy roster. Root for anybody but the Wings and BlackHawks and go see Pujols bully through the National league.

Ranger fans
No worries – your deeply flawed team had a great run, the Devils had a more painful collapse and the Islanders hardly exist. You’re still excited that you got a second chance to wear that custom Avery sweater and ARod is close to his return for the Yankes. Start cheering for the Caps. If they win the Cup the Rangers’s “meltdown” will be spun into “the start of Washington’s run” and you’ll get a better look at Semin and Ovy who will be over 35 and overpaid in a blue sweater down the line.

Devils fans
It might take a while before those Game 7 wounds heal. This should help:
Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band - Thu. May 21, Sat. May 23, IZOD Center. Cheer for Max Weinberg.

Canadiens fans
You guys should spend your evenings circling prospective free agents and booing the tv when Chara touches the puck. Those who felt the need to boo our National Anthem should enjoy the respite by spending more quality time with their teenage boytoys. Cheer for Larry Robinson.

Philly fans


Cheer against Crosby. Fuck it, cheer against everyone. Keep getting belligerent and scream down anybody who publically roots for another playoff team at the bar. You better get a few blurry fights under your belt this summer, you need to tune up before Eagles season.


Everyone else who still has skin in the game can look forward to at least 4 more games of drunken, sleepless nights and getting trapped in your personal glass cases of emotion. Just thinking about Eric Staal and Cam Ward makes me want to bleed out of my hair all over my keyboard. You have to love this time of year.

Good luck in round 2.

- Nemmy

Rabu, 29 April 2009

The Final 4... series that is

Bruins vs Hurricanes:

  • Besides the Rangers, this is the best match-up the Bruins could have asked for. Cam Ward might be able to steal a game, but Eric Staal is going to face Zdeno Chara every freaking game, so who knows how much Carolina will be able to score.
  • Bruins in 6
Capitals vs Penguins:

  • The only guarantee besides Pierre Maguire creaming himself while being between these benches is that you will see some great hockey.
  • The key to this series is Simeon Varlamav - Is he to dumb to realize where he is or will the pressure get to him. Caps fans, if you see Theodore in net, the series is over.
  • Penguins in 7
Red Wings vs Ducks

  • This series has all the makings for an upset for the Wings
  • Hot goalie, physical team, and superhot scoring line on the Ducks might chase Osgood.
  • I'm going to follow Scotty's logic though (I know) - In seven games can anyone beat the best?
  • Red Wings in 7
Canucks vs Blackhawks

  • Probably the best goaltending match up of the 4 series
  • I like the youth and scoring of the Hawks over the experience and grit of the Canucks
  • Blackhawks in 7


Here is the leaderboard after the 1st round (put your 2nd round picks in the comments)



Bress – 28

Cornelius– 40

Nemmy – 24

Mr. W – 22

Moe -31

Heals – 27 (swept the east)

Brando – 17

Lars – 16

Alex – 51

Mac – 24

Hark -31



What you missed last night because you were still at work (only valid for west coasters)

Hurricanes comeback and beat the Devils, 4-3 (CAR wins series 4-3): Both the first goal of the game and the final goal were eerily similar. Maybe both times Brodeur got screened by his defenseman, maybe the shots got slightly deflected. In any case you expect the all-time wins leader to make at least one of those saves. This great game did not get as much attention as the other game7, but there were some terrific passes:
- Parise's look to Langenbruner for the Devils first goal
- Gionta's wrist shot of a pass cross ice and off the board for Rolston to one-time for the Devils third goal
-The pass to Pandolfo, who perfectly deflected it on his backhand for the Devils second goal
- Joni Pitkanen's cross zone pass to Jussi Jokinen for the one-timer to tie the game up.
Carolina has a lot to handle in a well-rested Bruins team in round 2. I'll get to my predictions and the leaders of the2Man play-off game later today.


Capitals beat the Rangers, 2-1 (WAS wins series 4-3): With that game-winning goal, Sergei Federov will recieve an honory PhD from Snipe City U. It don't know if its more or less impressive that he didn't really look up when he shot. Did he just know where he was on the ice and no the spot to put the puck?
Caps and Penguins in round 2, expect these games on NBC.

Selasa, 28 April 2009

What you missed last night while were getting checked out for swine flu

Blackhawks beat the Flames, 4-1 (CHI wins series 4-2): The best Flame on the ice last night was Todd Bertuzzi. That was the problem for the Flames. Jarome, really didn't show up for the last 2 games of the series. Patrick Kane showed up. Khabibulin definitely showed up. And Dustin whose last name I can't spell, really showed up last night. The Flames could be the new Sharks (if the Sharks weren't still the Sharks) if they don't win a first round series again. The matchup against Vancouver should be another exciting series. Both the Canucks and the Blackhawks are fast, young, and gritty.

Ducks beat the Sharks, 4-1 (ANH wins series 4-2): Great fight Thornton, how about scoring a point? Getlaf lost that battle, but won the war. The fake shot on the point during the powerplay, opened up the lane to get the puck on net, where Corey Perry got a goal. Later, Getzlaf got his passport to Snipe City stamped again when he ripped a goal to comple the Gordy Hat Trick and put the nail in the coffin. Up next is the Red Wings for the Ducks. I'll have to really think about who I want to take in that one.

Senin, 27 April 2009

Weekend Wrap Up OR Who knew getting beat up could rally your team?

I was in Atlantic City for most of the weekend, so I missed a lot of hockey -I can't believe the Borgata didn't have the Center Ice Package! Anyway, as I was bleeding money at the black jack table I saw Daniel Carcillo pounce on a Penguin. I didn't catch who was until the replay and was surprised that Max Talbot was the other combatant. Even though Max got his ass handed to him (and black eye), that woke up his team who scored 5 unanswered goals to win the series. So the next time that some douchebag questions why fighting is in the game, use that example.

One last thing from that game - Sidney Crosby's first goal was great hand-eye coordination to knock it out of mid-air. However, he never gets that opportunity if he doesn't stop and go back to the front of the net. How many lazy players would have just glided around to the other side?



There were a lot of mid-air knock ins this weekend. Whitney had one last night. Someone else had one, I think in the San Jose game. Like I said, I missed a lot

I missed why Tortorella got all pissy. Because some one said that Staal likes to fuck Girardi? Way to preach discipline, Torts. Avery can really learn something from you. Some more questions from the Rangers/Caps series:

  • How come it took so long for Washington to figure out that Lundqvist has a weak glove?
  • Did Colton Orr get flagged for a horst collar tackle in Sunday's game?
  • Where is Nik Zherdev?
  • Who sat so Voros could play on Sunday?

Can someone please fill me on the Western Conference games from the weekend?

-Bress
.

Jumat, 24 April 2009

Webi: playoff beard

Play-off beards are just starting to get filled in, but take a lesson from Doug Weight before it gets out of control.


Untitled from Artem Agafonov on Vimeo.

What you missed last night while you were changing too slow

Devils shut-out the Hurricanes, 1-o (NJD lead series 3-2): Brodeur was one better than Cam Ward and thats all it came down to. A tip from David Clarkson - shot actually broke his stick - was all the Devils needed. I like how Brodeur, in the game after his meltdown, pitched a shut-out. Thats leadership and a veteran calm. Not much more to say about this game, except that between this and the Caps/Rangers series, its showing that 1-0 games can be exciting.

Ducks shut-out the Sharks, 4-0 (ANH leads series 3-1): The Ducks have one line. Really. Teemu Selanne is playing with Andrew Ebbits. Rob Neidermayer is a great grind guy. The Ducks only have one scoring line and Sharks can't keep up. Bobby Ryan (rookie stud), Corey Perry (freak stud), and Ryan Getzlaf (stud stud) roll through San Jose like they roll through SoCal. Is this really how its going to end for the Sharks? Also, Nabakov sneaky sucks this series.

Flyers shut-out the Penguins, 3-0 (PIT leads series 3-2): Holy crap, there were a lot of shut-outs last night. Not much to say about this game. Flyers did what they need to do. Penguins seemed slow. Back to Philly.

Red Wings win over the BJs, 6-5 (DET wins series 4-0): Heartbreaker for the BJs. Not that they would have won the series or even the game if it went to OT, but to comeback (twice!) and lose it shorthanded because of too many men on the ice call. That hurts. Also, imagine if Steve Mason actually played like he did in the regular season. This could have been a series or at least one more game. For everyone else in the West, if you can shut-down that offense, Osgood didn't look too sharp last night.

Kamis, 23 April 2009

Sahner Oil

Vancouver Spartans stats - 30 games in (Video Game Hockey)

Brad McGann - 75 goals, 35 assists - 110 points
John Giardino - 58 goals, 52 assists - 110 points
Matt Weindel - 75 goals, 70 assists - 145 points
Nemy - 5 goals, 65 assists - 70 points
Scotty - 8 goals, 56 assists - 64 points

Heals (goalie) - 30 wins 0.99 save percentage with 7 shutouts

Things have gotten wildly out of control.

I'd like to say something about the Washington-NYR series. To be honest I would like nothing more than the Rangers to lose, as an avid Islander fan it becomes just a natural part of the game rivalry to hate the opposing New York team. In this situation, you can't be a Mets fan and still not mind the Yankees. Hatred for the other side. Good fan friendly hatred not literally fighting or drunken abuse over it though.

However if the Rangers win, I actually would not mind it so much because it just keeps the playoff NHL spirit around NYC. Guys in my office that really could give a left testicle about the sport are all about it right now. I went to dinner with my girl and some friends last night and bumped into Paul Lenti (our college/men's league goalie) at Penn Station in his blueshirt. The energy is high...the team is poopy but it works and I get it so I officially cover my Ranger short in praise of the spirit around me for at least another series. If they go to the conference finals I may get a little over it but for now its ok.

I still think no one has a chance against the wings in 7 games. But hey stranger things have happened. The Bruins and the Wings look sharp as they should. Getting rid of those first round match-ups the way they did was very very professional.


This guy is me today.
He is also sneaky the opposite of everything.


On a different note but following the same theme...maybe


Does anyone even understand this?
Is it the ghost of Christmas Past?

Do you guys really think the Ducks will beat the Sharks? I think Jumbo Joe inflates and they open this thing up.

- Barnabus

Onto Round 2


Sorry if my random thoughts don’t make any sense this week. I’m not checking spelling or anything in this one so bear with me.

Congrats to the Boston Bruins for treating the Montreal Canadians like how a 1 seed should treat an 8th seed. I’m not going to write how disappointed I am that this series wasn’t a one-for-the-ages nail biter. I’m not going to write how I never thought I’d see a Montreal team rollover after getting up early on the Bruins in their own arena. That’s garbage. I’m over those assholes booing my Anthem. I’m pleased with the sweep and looking forward to getting some sleep before the second round.

These are my thoughts on the series and then I’ll put it behind me:

* Komisarek wants nothing to do with Milan Lucic. Mike is a tough guy and a rugged defender but Lucic has his number. Seeing Komisarek get tossed at the end of Game 4 was disappointing because I wanted to see those two guys shake hands in the line.

* Laraque should not retire. I realize his back isn’t holding up and he was out of place on Kovalev’s line early in the series but he was one of the more effective wingers in the 4th line role. To say that Chara, Ward and co. had a difficult time moving him from the crease is an understatement. Plus Georges was murder in the corners and laid out every Bruin at least once in the series.

* Not only was Laraque very gracious in the handshake line but he gave the cool urban handshake to every Bruin. He is awesome. Add this to my bucket list: get the cool urban handshake huggy thing from BGL before I die. Someone set this up. My birthday is December 10th.

*My girlfriend came home from the gym between the 1st and 2nd and I was all worked up from the period and needed to vent about what transpired. She was more interested in opening her mail about how her voting district had changed. Great.

* People love to rip on Jack Edwards but he was fantastic this series. I like his homer appeal and the way he leans on Andy Brickley for analysis. Many of those Youtube clips that people show of his calls are taken somewhat out of context.

* Patty Bergeron and David Krejci are the real deals. I can’t say enough about the way these guys play. I’m really freaking out right now.

* When the Bruins are at their best they are very businesslike and typical. The only guys who really show emotion are Thomas and Lucic. The rest of the team is very calm and professional like the assets in the Bourne Identity. Lucic lost his cool in game 2 and learned from it. He didn’t freak out when Komisarek sticked him in the closing minutes. I don’t know how Thomas stayed cool in this series. He had traffic all over him and at every whistle there was Lapierre, Latendresse, Laraque, LaKostitsyn, Ray LeBlanc, The chick from La Bouche and Jason LaBarbera in his face trying to get him to flip his shit. Way to take it like a man, Thomas.

* Chuck Kobasew all day. All fucking day. Just all day Chuck Kobasew. 1000.

* If the Bs can thrive in Montreal under all that madness then I’m confident they can stay focused in MSG where you could have heard a cell phone in the first 58 minutes of the game. The Canadien fans booed Price louder than the Rangers fans cheered at the end of the game.

* Fuck yeah, Michael Ryder. Enjoy this victory.

That’s all about that. Now I’m getting ready for the Rangers/Canes.

Other stupid quick things:
* I had a dream where Bress sent me a YouTube clip of two assholes doing stupid interviews with hockey players and calling themselves “the 2Man Bromantage”. It was awful and these guys had highlighted hair and were drinking energy drinks with Felix Potvin. If two assholes are going to do stupid interviews and make dumb jokes it’s going to be me and Scotty. I literally Googled “the 2 Man Bromantage” this morning just to see if I needed to kick somebody’s ass this weekend.

* Can you just play hockey and stop mouthing off, Adam Burish? You can’t guarantee any kind of “war” when you take 1 shot on net in 10 mins of icetime. Aside from the cross check to Rene Bourque’s face you haven’t made a dent in this series. If it wasn’t for warm-ups your underclothes would be cleaner than Jamie Foxes’s facial hair.I like your game and love the smack talk but let’s let your game make headlines before you go all media crazy. I get what you are trying to do but you’re not there yet.

* Ovy hit a post last night that was so loud my cat jumped up a bit. Wow. He was so tired after that shot. Wow.

* What’s with all the face washing in every series?

That’s all. Looking forward to the 2nd round.

- Nemmy

What you missed last night while you were looking up words in the dictionary

Bruins beat the Canadiens 4-1 (BOS wins series 4-0): A few games ago, the perfect example of the Bruins "wanting it more" was Chuck Kobasew beating captain Saku Koivu to a puck for an empty net goal. Last night it was David Krejci (who gives the worst in-between-period interview), bouncing off a Chris Higgins check, giving the puck to Ryder, and going to the net for the easy give-and-go goal. Boston was the best team in the east going into play-offs and it still looks like the road to the Finals will go through bean town.

Rangers beat the Capitals, 2-1 (NYR leads series 3-1): I've never seen a guy so tired when taking the "3 stars of the game" skate as Henrik Lundqvist. Not surprising as he stopped 38 of 39 shots. The one he missed was an absolute rocket from Alex Ovechkin (finally) that went bar-and-in. Captian Chris Drury scored on quite possibly the worst rebound give up, but was a little slow to take the mouth piece out and celebrate - I'll blame that on the hand injury.

Flames beat the Blackhawks, 6-4 (series tied 2-2)
: You had to stay up a little late to watch it, but it was worth it. If you look up the definition of "quick release" you'll find a video of Jarome Iginla's first goal last night. Some of the other goals were pretty, like Patrick Sharp's move then backhand no-look pass to Pat Kane for the games first goal. Some were not so pretty, like the turnover that led to Olli Jokinen's first goal. Most of them were of the go to the net hard variety. Saturday night is the next game. Watch it!

Rabu, 22 April 2009

What you missed last night while you were miss-playing a line drive to left field

Canucks beat the Blues in OT, 3-2 (VAN win series 4-0): I finally got an OT call right. Anyway, the OT was probably the best (almost) period that the Blues played all series. If not for repeatedly shooting at Roberto Luongo's chest, they might have won that game. Chris Mason actually made the better of the saves, but was once again supsetable to the weak five-hole shot. Did you catch Burrow's celebration? Yea, it was the bow-and-arrow tribute to Luc Bourdon. Got to love that.

Penguins beat the Flyers, 3-1 (PIT leads series 3-1): Marc-Andre Fluery was the difference in this game. He got peppered with 46 shots and made 45 saves, some in that you might categorize as sensational. The Flyers played well, real well. Mike Richards was an absolute beast on the ice, but it came down to Fleury making saves and Biron, not.

Sharks beat the Ducks, 4-3 (ANH lead series 2-1): The Sharks persevered last night in spite of Evegeni Nabakov. He was kind of awful - Carey Price level soft goals. Scoring 4, should give the Sharks confidence, especially since it was their big guns doing the work.

Red Wings beat the BJs, 4-1 (DET leads series 3-0)
: Before the puck dropped, Fox Sports Ohio (or whoever shows the BJs games on Center Ice) gave the viewers a look inside the BJs locker room. Wow, they were fucking tense. Not one smile. Just a lot of guys saying cliches ("play our game," etc). Then the Red Wings killed the crowd with that early Holmstrom goal. How impressive was it, that Hossa got the rebound upstairs so quickly off his backhand? Anyway, story of the series, Nash a non-factor and Osgood non-sucking.

Hurricanes beat the Devils, 4-3 (series tied 2-2): What a comeback ruined! Devils fight back from 3-0. Score 2 in the final period and then let up the game winner with less than a second. This is when a short memory comes in handy. Does anyone else think Brodeur acts the same way he did at the end of this game as when some takes the last drumstick at dinner?

Selasa, 21 April 2009

What you missed last night while you were icing your knees afer running the Boston Marathon

Bruins beat the Canadiens, 4-2 (lead series 3-0): Carey Price controls rebounds the way I do when playing roller hockey goalie. The puck (in my case, the ball) goes off to side, but its still in front and a professional hockey player can easily still finish - see goal, Ryder. A couple of years ago the Sabres beat the Senators with a game winning short-handed goal. I believe it was JP Dumont walking around captain Daniel Aflredsson. I lost respect for Alfie after that. Thats kind of how I felt when Chuck Kobasew beat Koivu to the loose puck last night to get the game clinching empty netter.

Capitals shut-out the Rangers, 4-0 (NYR leads series 2-1)
: Is Simeon Varlamov in the Rangers' heads now? He's pitched 5+ periods of shut-out hockey. I like his helmet also. Its like he told the designer, "I'll probably be in Hershey, but just in case make half the helmet a Caps helmet." Avery was typical bush-league at the end. I wonder if he'll get suspended? It was a head shot (see Lucic, Milan) and a message-send (see Carcillo, Daniel). The precendent is there Colin. Ovechkin hasn't scored yet, but he did have a nice primary assist. And when did Nick Backstrom get strong? Thursday's game is going to be a good one.

Flames beat the Blackhawks, 4-2 (CHI leads series 2-1): This is the series. I guess its just my man-crush on Jarome Iginla. Some of the goals this game were pretty. Like the Hawks first one. A win in the face-off - move the puck from d-to-d. down the wall to Toews, cross-crease pass to Sharp. And that equals a power play goal. Eric Nystrom then tied it up with a nice high glove snipe off a cross zone pass from Curtis Glencross. Then the goals got a bit uglier along with the game. There was some scrumming and hitting and everything that makes play-off hockey great. Stay up for these games, east-coasters!

Senin, 20 April 2009

Weekend Wrap Up OR Twitter makes me look like a fool

So a little background, ever since I can remember when a play-off game goes into overtime, everyone who I am with picks a winner from each team. If you follow The2Man twitter, you can see a time line of Bress' incorrect picks.

Anyway, the first weekend of playoff hockey was a great one. I'm not sure if its obvious to everyone, but you can just feel the players turning it up, tightening the D, and its only the first round!

Here are some surprises from the first round:

  • The Rangers - seriously. Look everyone knew that only shot they had was Lundqvist, but I don't htink anyone expected him to pitch a shut-out on the road and have the Rangers be up 2-0 going back to the garden.
  • Claude Giroux - kid had 51 points in 19 play-off games in the Q play-offs last year. And then with the big boys does plays like this:



that, my friends, is a penalty kill
  • Chris Osgood - look, its not like he's the reason the Wings are up 2-0, but come on, he's doing what he needs to do and didn't Theodore a game. (yes, Theodore is now a verb).
  • John Toews - Yes, he's the captain, doing what a captain should do in the play-offs. But my god, he's only 19 in his first play-offs ever (I don't count the frozen 4, those are single eliminations games)



Its a sick pass, but Toews knows to put it upstairs.

Not Surprises:
  • The Red Wings dominating


If you can not hit Holmstrom, you'll score.
  • The Canadiens/Bruins and Philly/Pitt series being all out wars.
  • The Devils/Canes series being very low scoring.
  • St.Louis about to get swept
  • The Sharks getting upset. Jonas Hiller is not Swiss cheese.

What did I miss?

-bress

Jumat, 17 April 2009

What you missed last night while you on a late night duane reade run

Blackhawks beat the Flames in OT, 3-2 (lead series (1-0): I incorrectly called the winner, but didn't mind, at all, watching Havlat finish off a hell of a game. I'm not going to talk about the goalie interference - everyone just stop it. Part of this game is the human factor of the refs. Everyone always gets calls for and against them. Its frustrating, but don't let it ruin the game for you. The crowd at the United Center was out of control - surging with the Hawks rushes. I love that - you know when you here the crowd get excited just their team is developing an opportunity. Watch high-lights and listen to the crowd on Kane's semi break away. Anyway, there was so much goodness in this game. Toews was an absolute beast. He'll be in our top 5.

Red Wings bet the BJs, 4-1 (lead series 1-0)
: This game was a pleasant surprise in the physicality, but otherwise I was dissapointed with the Jackets game. Osgood was a nice surprise and thats not good for Red Wing haters or even fans who think Osgood is the achilles heel of the team.

Bruins beat the Canadiens, 4-1 (lead series 1-0): This game had a little bit of everything to please all hockey fans. Great saves by Timmy Thomas, for those who love to the most athletic players on the ice show off their stuf. Great hitting, all you have to do is watch Lucic. Some super vision - Metropolit seeing and moving the puck quickly to Higgins for the Canadiens first goal or Ryder putting the puck into perfect space for Krejci's backhand goal. It was all there and Kovalev's goal shows why he is the mayor of Snipe City. And of course, don't forget all the salt.

Ducks shut-out the Sharks, 2-0 (lead series 1-0)
: This was the absolute worst case scenario for the Sharks. Losing the first game, getting shut-out, all of it. If you take away one thing to remember from this game, let it be - Getzlaf's snap shot. It was the nail-in-the-coffin goal and it was bar and in. For that goal, Getzlaf get an honary key to Snipe City.

Kamis, 16 April 2009

The Bruins play tonight and I can’t focus. Here are some quick thoughts/stuff :


There is no worse feeling than the moment that the other team realizes that your goalie really sucks. I bet the entire Captials bench puked all over themselves when Gomez scored that soft goal last night. I’ve been there. I’ve been on strong teams with weak goaltending and you play 60 minutes praying that my netminder doesn’t out himself as a complete fraud. Once he lets in a soft goal your stomach drops as you see the other squad half cheer half laugh. You can literally see the point when the other guys realize that the kid is a joke and should just start firing. That trend is impossible to reverse. I feel awful for the Caps right now. Those of you who know which game I’m thinking about just leave it alone and join me in feeling bad for Ovy and Co.


Now that John Madden has retired does this mean I won’t be able to watch Frank Caliendo on tv?


The Rosetta Stone lady is sneaky. If you get coug’d by her it would be a huge win.




I’m freaking out about the Bruins game tonight. On paper the Bruins should dominate but that gets thrown out when rivalries come into play. In all seriousness the Rangers could play the Isles in the opening round it could go to 7 games. I really believe that.


The main reason that I’m nervous for the Bruins is that so many people picked them to either win outright or get to the Finals. Things were so easy when I was the only guy in my circle of friends who cheered for or really believed in this team. Now that people start picking them for success it feels like they are jinxing them. I tend to sandbag because I feel like the Bruins won’t play well if I expect them to play well. It’s a retarded view but one that comes with rooting for the teams I root for.


We are trying to get a street hockey game going for Saturday starting right after the Caps game starting at 1 and before our buddies album release party starting at 6. Timing is tight but if we can pull that off it would be awesome.


Scott Hartnell was ridiculous last night. 16 PIMs, awful hair and the fucking guy bigtimed Scotty at some club on Long Island last week.


Seriously, the Theodore thing is bothering me. I know that Avery clipped Mike Green for Gomez’s goal but it was so bad. The Capitals need to get that PP working so that the Rangers don’t advance. A team that hangs in games that they don’t belong playing in (they lost 70% of faceoffs?) just because they have a strong goaltender and almost nothing else shouldn’t advance. That stuff is fine for a few games here and there like Dallas a few years ago when Turco was insane but those teams shouldn’t move on.


I’m expecting Mike Richards to really bring it to another level in Game 2.


Parise is a maniac. Why isn’t he all over the blogs and internet? Because he plays in NJ? He’s American, dirty, and clean shaven. What am I missing? Someone send us his email so we can get him on our show this summer. Thanks


Crosby is nasty. He likes to whine to the refs but he is sick. Admit it. Just because you love the way Ovechkin plays doesn’t mean you can’t admit that Sid is sick.


Tkachuk has a lot of white in the facial hair. If he gets to the second round and loses 30lbs he could look like Santa. That was stupid. Whatever.


What is the deal with Drury? He took a puck to the face his last season in Buffalo. This injury must be a big deal.


This kid was in on the subway the other day with all his skater buddies. I sneaky took a photo of his hat but couldn’t get one of his buddy who was wearing an old Kings hat that looked like the old Raiders hats. This picture probably deserves it’s own post at some time.


Back to work.


- Nemmy

What you missed last night because the Versus feed was like the Playboy channel growing up

I missed the Vancouver/St. Louis game last night because my Versus feed was scrambled like my eggs. This morning I saw 2 people wearing Rangers jerseys on my walk to the subway. That is way more than the usual zero I see.

Canucks beat the Blues, 2-1(lead series 1-o): As I said above, I couldn't watch this game. I did see the high-lights (twice) on NHL: On the Fly this morning. The slap pass from Demitra to Sedin for the first goal is true beauty. Its an obvious pass, because of the angle, but its got to be a slap to get enough speed on it to beat a goalie five-hole. Also, when Matt Barnaby was analyzing the play on ESPN this morning he said, "you can't give Demitra that much time and space." Well Matty, it was pretty much a power play for Vancouver as Lunogo had gone to the bench on a delayed power play. Thats why he had so much time and space to pick out Sedin in the slot. Oh yea, and Luongo has give up 2 goals in his last 4 or so games. Thats not grease in his hair, thats him exuding confidence.

Penguins beat the Flyers, 4-1 (lead series 1-0): If was writing a New York Times trendwatching piece about the NHL play-offs, it would be about face-offs. See everyone knows how important face-offs are, but I would make it a times trendwatch piece, by just talking about it now and only using limited evidence - like last nights Penguins game. The Penguins won almost 65% of the draws. And with the 9 power plays they had, thats a lot of time where Philly didn't have the puck. It wasn't complete domination, but the numbers make it seem that way. Also, somehow Daniel Carcillo got in trouble. He was more invisible than Chevy Chase in that move.....

Devils beat the Hurricanes, 4-1 (lead series 1-0): This game was complete domination by the home team. Cam "hot in march" Ward was not great, but also took on more shots than a Mr. W at a high school keg party. The Devils played like an efficient machine last night. The little plays they make are so fundamentally sound. For example on Elias' snipe - he doesn't get that puck if Gionta doesn't take the right angle to get body positioning on the Canes defenseman. Also, Parise went low stick side from the goal line - how is that possible!?

Rangers win over the Capitals, 4-3 (lead series 1-0): Jose Theodore made the Rangers an offensively gifted team. Well, so did Jeff Shultz. Henrik Lundqvist plays so deep in his net, it makes me think that he never learned his angles. I've always admired the Rangers penalty kill, its seems to me the most logical and ferocious way to be a man down. Lastly, Blair Betts broke his stick sliding to block Ovy's last second shot. Thats play-off hockey.

Rabu, 15 April 2009

The weekend and the playoffs

So this past weekend...passover night actually, I went out to a club on Long Island with my good friend Aaron and my cousin Brittany. Brittany works for a liquor distributor in the marketing division so she gets to go to clubs and bars and drink free bottles in an attempt to rep the brand of liquor. Its a great gig for now but she says she doesn't want to do it for too much longer, obvious reasons, there's just so much drinking and partying on the week nights you can do.

So they were out of tables so we set up at the end of the bar with 4 bottles of this crazy Tequila and a SUPRA bottle of Goose. After about an hour Carnage started to come out (featured above) and Nemy wasn't there to put him away so me and Aaron started walkin' around the club. We stopped by the main entrance and started to chat while observing shorties in da club (don't worry I won't type like this the whole time) and noticed a bunch of dudes walking in. Scruffy guys and one of them had no front teeth. I looked at Aaron and I'm like these guys have to be hockey players. Oh wait maybe they're the Soundtigers who are up with the Islanders and I don't recognize them but than I did recognize Jeff Carter and Mike Knuble. Yes the Flyers got out of the garden as fast as possible that night and Aaron Asham was apparently showing them a pre-playoff night.

I spoke with Knuble for a few seconds because well you just have to talk to Mikey Knuble. He wished me luck with the show and I ditto'd with luck for him in the playoffs. A genuine man if I may say so. Hartnell kinda snubbed me as i said in passing at one point in the night, "Hey Scott good luck in the playoffs man!" He kinda snubbed me just reiterating Nemy's intitial take on him. Nemy's grudge with him lies with his impulsive need to start shit after the whistle with people. It's his game and I understand that and he has had a phenomenal year but it's the way that he does it. And the hair and negative 1000. Nobody but me knows who the hell you are in that club that you have to throw a snub. I have a hockey show...thats one in a million dude. Again negative 1000.At another point in the evening, I saw Danny Carcillo in the bathroom. There were like 50 dudes in there and I remember saying to myself drunk, does anybody know that there is a professional maniac in the bathroom with all of us right now. As we were washing our hands, I said to him, "If you don't absoultely rip someones head off in the playoffs!" He laughed and we parted ways. Good kid. That could mean strong things for the Flyers in the playoffs that I saw them there. I saw McCabe pre-season one time at IceWorks and he had his best season ever. I know that all means nothing but I don't have the Flyers winning it. Speaking of winning it. Lets here who you guys have taking it. Here is my playoff tree for the first round.

East

NJ - Car: NJ

Bos - Mon: Bos

Phi - Pitt: Phi

NYR - Was: Was


West

Anh - San: San Jose

Van - St.Louis: St. Louis

Det - Cob: Det

Cgy - Chi: Cgy

I think Detroit will win it all. Don't know why. Buying a top...I know...been doing it all day.

- Barbone
Artem's jib arm.
P.s. If any of you have any youtube clips of great goals, hits, saves, passes funny things related to hockey...quick clips...not long put the link in the comments, thanks!

Selasa, 14 April 2009

Play-off side bets and a rant on VS and praise for the NHL


Last night I had to explain to my girlfriend that the NHL play-offs were starting and that we could hang out, but the TV would always need to have a hockey game on. Maybe I should just forward her the email above. Its from the NHL and sometimes their marketing department gets it right. Not the "portal" commercial, but remember this...



One day last year I tried to sit down and get every player and year from that commercial - an hour later I was only 9 seconds in.


Here's my quick rant about Versus:

Last night while I was waiting for the Mets game to start I flipped over the MSG and watched a bit of Hockey Nigh Live's Play-off preview show. For those of you not in the tri-state area Hockey Night Live is like NHL on the Fly for just the Rangers, Islanders and Devils. I sometimes watch just to see Ken Daneyko's suits. Anyway, I then flipped over the NHL Network to see their preview show. Curiously, I wondered what Versus had on. They of course had a play-off prev- just kidding. They were showing boxing or turkey chasing or whatever. I do not understand how a network can continually say they are "partners" with the NHL and not have any supporting content for hockey. Just showing the games is not enough!

Fin



Play-off side bets:

Who will have the greatest play-off beard this year?
I bet Scott Neidermayer is already in Finals form.
Any one of those hairs could be a 3o goal scorer.



Ok, I have to end the post on that.


Don't forget to put your picks for The2ManAdvantage play-off pool in the comments.


-Bress

Senin, 13 April 2009

Weekend Wrap Up OR The return of the confusing t2MA! playoff pick game!

First of all, for Islander, King, Thrasher, Lightning, and Avalanche fans, your one-day play-off is tomorrow for the 1st overall pick. Here is my guess - the Kings get the #1 pick, then Isles, Lightning, Avs, Thrashers.

In other news, The 2 Man Advantage will be participating in a Sportsnet.ca play-off fantasy game, thing with some bloggers. We were invited by The Battle of Western Canada, so follow it there. We'll update you as well.


Heres the simple truth about the playoffs right now based on the past weekends games (in bullet format):

  • Washington looks like it could be the top seed to go down. Theodore is playing worse than a blind man in a poker game. Even though the Rangers couldn't score on midget in a soccer goal, Lundqvist is on fire and hot goalies rule all in the universe known as play-off hockey.



  • Speaking of hot goalies, the Flyers don't have one. Thusly, they will be beaten by the Penguins in the first round. And even if Philly somehow makes it a series, they'll regret losing that home ice advantage on the last day of the season.




  • If the Montreal/Boston series could be won by getting more penalty minutes, then the Canadiens might win. Tim Thomas is a beast while Carey Price will make 2 great saves, but still give up a softie.

  • Does anyone care about the Devils/Hurricanes series?
  • Sharks and Ducks series will be a bruiser. In nature, the Sharks would win easily.
  • The Red Wings looked prime for an upset if they faced any other team then the currently awfully playing BJs. Only Steve Mason can save them now.... well and Rick Nash
  • Will the Flames be able to have a full roster? Do cap issues affect the post season?
  • The St.Louis Blues are the feel-good story of the league. Unfortunately, they are facing the shut-out robot 2000 aka Roberto Luongo.



Finally, we will be having our own game again this year. You pick the winner of each series and how many games it will take. You get 7 points if you pick the right team and games. Its a one point deduction for each game off you are. And you are awarded zero points if you pick the wrong team. Does that make sense? Put your picks in the comments. The winner will get a t-shirt!

Here are Bress' picks:

Boston in 5
Washington in 6
New Jersey in 7
Pittsburgh in 7

San Jose in 7
Detroit in 5
Vancouver in 6
Calgary in 7

Jumat, 10 April 2009

What you missed last night because you were listening to Gary Thorne call the Frozen Four

Sorry for the delay, a bit busy on the desk this morning. Also, I really didn't watch any NHL last night, so these haikus might be random.


Canucks shut-out the Kings, 1-0:
A soccer score with
the captain having a shut-out.
Dangerous in May?

Bruins beat the Canadiens in OT, 5-4:
I would love to see
this as another first round
match-up. Lots of blood!

Rangers beat the Flyers, 2-1:
Rangers are in - great.
Flyers lost, but still party
at Mirage. Right Zimm?

Panthers beat the Thrashers, 3-2:
Say goodbye to the
Bouwmeaster. They needed to
beat the Thrashers more.

Predators beat the Red Wings in the shoot-out, 4-3
:
No one wants to see
this as a first round match up.
Preds tease and then lose.

Coyotes beat the Sharks, 4-1:
Montoya has a
bad-ass mask and a sick goals
against already.

Penguins win over the Islanders, 6-1:
Long Island ladies
get ready to look up at
Mr. Tavares.

Devils win over the Senators, in the shoot-out, 3-2
:
Is Marty back on
his game? The Devils went bust
to soon. Still cup faves?

Capitals beat the Lightning, 4-2:
Will Theodore be
able to carry the Caps
into second round?

Sabres beat the Hurricanes, 5-1:
No Buffalo in
this years play-offs. Are Canes still
hot? Only time tells.

Stars win over the Avalanche in the shoot-out, 3-2:
The next goalie to
face Ribiero should just come
out and punch him. BAM!

Kamis, 09 April 2009

Mens League Confidential

Katy Perry is really hot (has nothing to do with hockey or this entry)

I'm only writing this MLC because:


a) we haven't written one of these in ages
b) I have nothing to talk about until the playoff matchups are set on Sunday
c) our 2Man Director/Cameraguy/ Brooklyn by way of Moscow hipster, Artem had a remarkable game last night

Here's how it went down. Last night was the first night of Passover so many of the guys on our squad called in Jewish. An 11:30PM scheduled game seems to make many people ultra religious. Artem was supposed to be at a DJ'd event thrown by the boyfriend of one of his friends or something like that. The party sounded ultra gay and Artem only stayed for a short period of time.

He picked me up to go to the rink and was in a bad mood because he effed something up at work and got chewed out for it and this party zapped him of any spirit he was trying to harness before the game. He was out of sorts and needed to right the ship. In short: Artem was angry and looking for some release.


He got it on the ice


Artem's first shift was one for the mens league record books. He scored first time out, intercepted 4 passes, cycled like a wicken, knocked down pucks and had probably 18 shots on net total. In 1:15 he provided more offense than the New York Islanders in April. He was almost unstoppable.

Normally Artem loafs around the ice missing passes and second guessing himself into shooting pucks at goalies stomachs. Indecision and a lack of confidence usually makes Artem melt into a gel-like substance that coats cans of Spam or Super Supper. Last night, confident Artem was one-timing shit, winning faceoffs (which NO ONE on our team has ever done) and batting down pucks everywhere. Guys were trying to sauce shit by him and he would just knock the puck down and sprint to the net. He was like a guy in a hair club commercial who climbs out of the pool and lets some dirty milf stroke his lifelike scalp. He was oozing bravado. It was disgusting but I couldn't look away.

At one point Artem was cycling down in the zone and I came in from the point looking for a pass in the slot. Artem looked me off, swung around and got his own shot on net. All of a sudden he was creating plays for himself and hogging the puck. He was in the zone and everyone else needed to get the fuck back in bed.

I felt like I was running the floor with Kobe when he was going for 40+. He was NBA jamming and the rest of us were decoys.


He had something like 4 of our 9 goals and he missed maybe 45 other scoring ops mainly because the other goalie was pretty damn good. A few times Artem tried the move where he would burn across the crease and leave the puck behind him hoping the goalie would follow and in would go in opposite side. Twice the netminder got a miraculous toe on the puck.

The best part about the night is that Artem is a Jew! He came to play because he wanted to release some anger and he scored 4 goals and assfucked a sacrificed lamb that he had waiting in the locker room. His ninja prowess was a tradition unlike any other. Artem has died, Artem has risen, Artem will come again.




Look at his face in this picture. He has never ever smiled in a photo. He's retarded. Enjoy your game puck, Artem.

Happy Easter



Let's go Nashville


-Nemmy

What you missed last night while you were trying to figure out the NHL "Portal" commercial (why is there a rusty sink at the end?)

Sabres beat the Maple Leafs, 3-1: So the Sabres are still alive until tonight when Florida should get 2 points from Atlanta. The Maple Leafs missed a lot of good chances and at times Curtis Joseph looked like he was doing an impression of me playing roller hockey goalie. In short, there's a reason both of these teams are on the outside looking in.

Blue Jackets beat the Blackhawks in the shoot-out, 4-3: This was a great game from 2 play-off bound teams in the west. In short, the complete opposite of the other game. Here's really why it was such a good game -the best players on each team were the best players on the ice. Khabibulan made some spectacular saves. Nash scored, got a penalty shot opportunity and put one in his own net. Havlat and Kane teamed up for one of the go ahead goals. It was kind of weird to see the BJs bench after regulation. They didn't know if it was alright to be happy or not. They got the one point to clinch there first ever play-off spot. I think they are a dangerous team in the first round.

Rabu, 08 April 2009

The Writ of Habeus Corpus

So the 2man head to head league is heading into the homestretch in the final matchup with Bradly's team edging a slight advantage. I spoke with his opponent, team Spin-O-Rama and Trefo is upset over Bradly's consistent add/drop during the gentlemens weak of the finals. Me anAdd Imaged Tanella laughed because he has no idea who he is up against. It is close, being tied through the first week and 6-5 currently going into the last weekend. Good luck to the both of you clowns.
In the video game parlor, the Spartans continue their seige on the league. 15-0. Mikey Heals has 8 shutouts and a 4 game streak going right now. Wendel has edged in points with 68 in 15 games with Bradly trailing by 5 or so. Nemy is leading the D pairing in points but Barbonus is crushing people. The best part is watching the computer try and even things out intra-division. Allow me to elaborate. I am in the southeast division so the computer sees my ranking based on the 5 starting players and how we have not lost. By the way to fill the roster, the rest of my team are players from the Japanese national squad. The computer gets frustrated and tries to cheat by stacking the other rosters in the southeast, which I don't mind because it fosters equality and competition. However, Carolina is running Ovy, Crosby, Datsyuk, Nash, Staal and Ray Whitney and couldn't even get a goal on Heals. We had a home and home with them yesterday and they grabbed a cloned version of Wendel to center the first line. Taking him fromt he free agent list, not obeying the laws of reality just in desperation. Our team is unstoppable. The king and his court. THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!!

I really think Detroit will win the cup. 7 games...no one beats that team. Barring poopyshawn from Osgood which may very well happen. Conklin isn't too bad either, so there isn't TOO bad of a last option for them.

After watching the Rangers game yesterday, I have decided that Montreal is neagtive. Not flat, negative. And Sean Avery is a major positive for New York when he plays like he can and did. Nemy kinda liked the move on Tim Thomas but thats just silly too me. If anything say stuff to him like Paul Newman did in Slapshot. She's a dike.....I know! I know! That's good stuff. I can't wait to see Thomas in net for the U.S. next winter. Nemy won't live it down that I built up a massive short position in Thomas a few years back only to cover for a murderous loss late last season. I made back a little of the loss going long T. Thomas this season. Accept the loss and move on. He plays a tight game. I enjoy tight and succinct.

Does everyone clearly remember Al Iafrate's hair? I mean really?
Just refresh yourselves.

Sometime the shark go away....sometime he wouldn't go away.
Get some...have some cuz its awesome. The island of what? Which ever it is, thats where you can find me and Nemy on Friday afternoon with a bottle of Sark. It's like the island of Tinney and Delahee.

This is a picture of OVY just juicing. We were discussing who is the best (equipment wise) looking player in the league. Who do you think? Is it boaty Tkachuk or Andrew Cuomo?

Remember to get that glow this weekend and explode when necessary.

- Zell

What you missed last night because you were taken hostage by Somali pirates

Senators beat the Bruins, 3-2: Dany Heatleys rush that hit the post - Heater, cut and jumped in between 2 Boston d-men. When he was on his back he managed to lift the puck over Manny Fernandez's shoulder only to be denied by the cross bar. Also Sen's coach Clouston got extended for 2 years - so he'll be fired next January?

Rangers beat the Canadiens, 3-1: Drury's 1st goal - It was kind of a broken play and Drury just turned and fired it on net and the puck went by Carey Price. Price's reaction was priceless (sorry) as he couldn't believe Drury found room. It wasn't a snipe, but it just shows pure skill and instinct.

Canucks beat the Flames, 4-1: Iginla's goal - All the Nuck goals were of the ugly, bouncy variety. Jarome was behind the net, practically, got the puck off his skate and onto his stick and in the net in the time it takes to look at cleavage and then look away.

Kings beat the Oilers, 2-1: The fights - Super tall rookie Brian Boyle had a nice scrap with much shorter Theo Peckham. Penner fought Johnson - meh. Later Zach Stortini fought Ratis Ivanis.

Wild beat the Stars, 3-1: Gaborik's goal - Overall, Marian had a great game, adding 2 assists to his goal. But the goal was nice, because of the patience and pass of Andrew Brunnette.

Blues beat the Coyotes, 5-1
: Tkachuk's goal - Honestly, Bryzgalov was brutal and he gave the puck away to Tkachuk. But Tkachuk didn't just fire it on net. He waited, found the room and fired it upstairs. It was Mr. W-esque.

Maple Leafs win over the Devils, 4-1
: Taylor Hanson's first goal - Li'l Hanson drove to the net and got his first ever NHL goal. Got to love that.

Blackhawks beat the Predators, 4-2
: Toews snipe - First of all it was bar-and-in. I love that. Second of all there are few players who if you give room coming over the blue line can beat a keeper with a wrist shot. I hope Toews turns into one of those players.

Penguins win over the Lightning, 5-3: Crosby's first goal - There was a great camera angle for this goal. Crosby's one-time were perfectly placed, just inside the post. Rammo had no shot.

Sharks win over the Avalanche in the shoot-0ut, 1-0
: Peter Budaj - His best save was the one he had where he robbed JR. He moved across and then got the glove up enough to beat JR one-timer attempt in front.

Capitals beat the Thrashers, 4-2: Caps backhand goals - Both Kozlov and Semin had sweet backhand goals. Kozlov's was in tight and Semin's was on a breakaway.

Hurricanes shut-out the Islanders 9-0
: Its not even fair to talk about this game, but Staal did have a hat trick.

Flyers beat the Panthers, 2-1
: Hartnell's cross-check - Carter got the goal, but it doesn't happen with out the ref missing that call.

Selasa, 07 April 2009

What you missed last night while you were dreaming about Doug Weight

Senators beat the Canadiens, 3-2: Alexei Kovalev is the mayor of Snipe City. He beat Gerber saturday night with a sick shot on the power play. And his quick release beat Auld to the far side last night. If Kovalev's the mayor, then Heatley must be the deputy sheriff of Snipe City. He walked into the wrister that was the game winner. Halak never had a chance. Tonight the Canadiens need the win versus the Rangers. Anyone know what channel that game is on?

Red Wings beat the Sabres, 4-1
: Hossa got 39 and 40 last night. He is just having a superb year and should probably win the Selke. Osgood played very solidly last night except on the one goal he gave up, he kind of pulled the ol' statue of liberty hold up the glove, but I don't have the puck move. Reminds me of Pat Roy in the playoffs years ago.

Flames win over the Kings, 4-1: The Flames really, just kind of dominated the game last night. It was like they knew they were better and just played that way. A nice ugly goal from poor-man's Owen Nolan, Craig Conroy. Then a sweet one-timer from Iggy and a nice pass from Conroy to Moss who finished. When Calgary plays this well they will dominate.

Senin, 06 April 2009

Avery, Thomas and JP Nuzzo

As much as I love Timmy Thomas, the Boston Bruins and the rules of our sport I can't seem to get worked up over Sean Avery's 'accidental' stick incident last Saturday.



It would be hypocritical for me to get up in arms when I pulled the same shit when I was playing.

Warning: we're starting story time now. JJ Putz just came in to protect the Mets 2-1 lead in the 8th and this story could really get away from me and turn into an hour long tale that goes nowhere. I'll start writing but there's no telling where we may end up. You've been warned.

In high school Heals and I played for a Catholic school that drew kids from the neighboring towns. Every team we faced was considered a rival because, for the most part, we would be playing against the home squad of at least 2 or 3 guys on our team.

Most of the time there were friendly rivalries where guys would battle on the ice and share a laugh after the game. You grew up in that town and played youth hockey with many of the guys we faced in high school so it never got too heated or too friendly most of the time.

Heals's hometown was different; Hamden, Connecticut hated Healey. I don't know where it got ugly but some of the kids that Heals used to call friends were part of the group that threw jars of spaghetti sauce threw his windows in high school. Some of the mothers that Heals's mom used to sit next to when watching their mites bump around the ice were the same mothers who would taunt and jeer her at the local grocery. Shit was so weird and personal when we played Hamden and, being his friend and teammate, it was impossible not to get caught up in some of it.

Playing in that Hamden rink was always an adventure for us. We knew going in that the crowd would be hostile not just because they hated Heals but because it seemed like the whole town had nothing else in their lives other than high school hockey. The parents who had kids took these games as seriously as their sons did and the people who didn't have skin in the game seemed even more invested in the outcome. The environment was awesome and completely frightening all the same time.

Anyways, while playing in Hamden's barn late senior year the crowd was getting on Heals during the warm ups. It wasn't anything out of line or anything we hadn't heard before but in a must win game for both teams this crowd was gaining an edge before the puck was dropped. Again, they were awesome and positively terrifying all at the same time.

We were used to big audiences and the venom didn't really bother us that much but since they were making it tough for my goalie to start the game I tried to turn things around on their guy. We had an ice cut after warm ups and when the doors opened to start the 1st I skated the length of the ice and slashed their netminder in the head as head stretched atop his crease.

I did it to shake things up. I wanted to pull the kid off of his focus and I wanted the crowd to get all fired up that some dirty scumbag slashed their goalie and the refs didn't see it. Most importantly I wanted my teammates to see that I was not going to let some energized parents and fans dictate the tone of the game. They paid the $5 to get into the door but they came to see my show. Any physical tone would be set by me.

Truth being told I actually liked the other goalie. We went to school together and he was one of the nicest kids you'd ever meet. I had nothing against him off the ice but I'd do almost anything to win including cheap shots and dick moves to give my team the advantage. That's why I can't fault Avery for slapping Thomas the Tank Engine's helmet the other day. He didn't go out to injure him, he simply wanted to shake up the goalie who was stoning his team back into the 8th playoff spot. If Thomas went apeshit, lost his focus and gave up a soft goal after the game you would all crown Avery as a master pest. Instead he did his job and it didn't work.

If Avery gets suspended it would be a joke on par with when the league punished him for a stupid press conference. Avery hits Thomas, Thomas goes after Avery they both get 2 mins and hockey is back to normal. They'll see each other again. Hockey has a great way of evening things out.

As for Avery's intent, I can't fault him. A dbag tried to stir things up with a dick move and it didn't work. This dbag sees nothing wrong with that.

-Nemmy

Putz, KRod = Yes. See you tomorrow.

Weekend Wrap-Up


Not sure if we are purposely holding off with the weekend wrap up but it might be a good time to get something up on the blog today.

Here's where we stand right now:

1 - Boston - 112 - locked and loaded
2 - DC - 104 - same
3 - NJD - 102 - about to wrap up the division
4 - Philly - 95 - Carter is still going crazy
5 - Carolina - 95 - playing out of their minds right now
6 - Pitt - 93 - post season bound; not playing great hockey
7 - Mon - 92 - wouldn't like to face them in the opener. OTT, NYR, BOS, PITT to end things
8 - NYR - 89 - 3 games before pencils down. MTL, PHILLY (2x) to end things

Florida - 89 - 3 games: at Philly, at ATL, DC = not impossible
Buf - 85 - 4 games left: DET, at TOR, at CAR, BOS = good luck with allll that.

1 - SJ - 115 - locked and loaded
2 - DET - 109 - same but with a 'different' Osgood than last season
3 - CGY - 94 - So many moving parts in the west. Great logjam in the middle here
4 - CHI - 97 - Nice to see Chicago back in the post season
5 - VAN - 94
6 - CBJ - 90 - Really rooting for this team
7 - ANA - 88
8 - NSH - 86 - This team too

St. Louis - 86 - feel good story of hockey right now. Last 3: at PHO, CBJ, at COL
Minnesota and Edmonton have 86 points, 3 games left and a chance to ruin the playoffs if they get in.

We'll do the whole playoff match up preview needfull when the dust settles this weekend. We'll do some half ass analysis, makes awful picks and maybe even include a video or two. Who knows?

Games tonight:
Det at Buffalo - Make or break for the Sabres.
Ott at Montreal - a few weeks ago I was talking about how great it would be if Montreal missed the playoffs in it's indulgent 100 year anniversary. Crazy.
LA at Calgary - I'll be asleep.

What else happened? Avery was a dick (on the ice), Crosby stuck up for Malkin, Tim Thomas still will make less then Lundquist, Turco etc, Ron Wilson will coach us in Vancouver, and the Isles look like they can secure that last spot in the league despite the sick play of Yann Danis (for real).

I was away all week so I missed a shitload. Apparently I had today off from work too but only found out when I saw my boss at 7am.

Help fill me in.

- Nemmy

Jumat, 03 April 2009

Value?



You wanna talk about value? David Backes. Big Backes! He had 4 goals last night? LOL!!!!


30 goals, 21 assists with a man size 163 pim factor. Those numbers are respective of late 80s Joel Otto on the Flames with the helmut and the action. Laith work.

Even Willem Dafoe as a Vampire is even perplexed at those Backes Boards!

- Scott

What you missed last night while you were incorrectly identifying Julianne Moore while getting banana pudding

Its Friday. Its hockey haikus. You know the drill

Flames beat the Stars, 2-1:
I want Calgary
to face Columbus in the
first round of play-offs.

Ducks win over the Canucks in the shoot-out, 6-5:
This was one crazy
game of hockey. Comeback by
the ducks and the win.

Canadiens beat the Islanders, 5-1:
This loss will help both
teams. Isles get closer to top
pick and Tavares (?)

Sharks beat the Oilers, 2-1:
Oilers are closer
to "vortex of death."MacT
is closer to fired.

Bruins beat the Senators, 2-1:
Who will overpay
for Tim Thomas in July?
My bet is Toronto.

Blues win over the Red Wings, 5-4:
David Backes is
a fantasy playoff stud.
4 goals equals yes

Hurricanes beat the Rangers, 4-2:
Paul Maurice, coach
of the year? How did this team
get to fourth in East.

Coyotes beat the Kings, 2-1:
Al Montoya has
given up only one goal
in 2 games. Nice start!

Kamis, 02 April 2009

So last night...

You knew the Capitals were going to come back last night versus the Islanders but you didn't know how and in what time span. I tuned in and out, but the last time I tuned in before the Mike Green overhaul was when the Isles had a 3-2 lead. The powerplay started and you knew a good team which the Capitals are, would probably be able with 10 minutes to go, to find a way to at least tie this up versus the last place team. The powerplay started and it was over before it began. I tuned back in about 5 minutes later to find that the Isles were down again and before I could even let out a Bressler groan which many of his friends know all too well, Mike Green's hands were in the air with another PPG. The man has 30 goals and over 40 assists and he missed 10 games. What!!!!! This is ridiculous. Howie Rose was saying how he couldn't imagine how any one else would win the Norris. Billy Jaffe than said Chara and Boyle would get high mention....yes they would but are you serious this year Mike Green? If he doesn't win the Norris, than the 2man Advantage ceases to exist...my goodness!

Of course Nikolai Khabibulin lost the shut-out bid for my fantasy squad with 2 seconds left on the clock. Are you joking dude? They took a penalty and the freakin wheels fell off. I would have rather he lost the game at this point. Go home!

On to other news. Last night, I created a new NHL 09 squad. Wow! The name of the created team is the St. Paul Spartans. The jerseys...well lets just say that they resemble the team colors of the Miami Dolphins from the first tecmo bowl nintendo game.

Obviously the team on the right.

Like a metallic sky blue with greens and dark blues throughout. So Sexy! Ridiculous but sexy! The squad is 5 men and a goalie like the King and his court. Matty Weindel centers the unit with Brad Mcgan on the left side and John Giardino on the right. What's really great is that they make you choose a name that the announcers call you by. Obviously they don't have Weindel but they have many other W's. I chose Winchester as the nickname for Matty, Maclean for Brad because I loved John Maclean from the Devils and more from Die Hard and Gianolla for Gio which is utterly ridiculous. The D-unit is comprised of Nemy and Scotty. Last night there was a great moment between the two D-men. The following video is Scott Stevens top 10 hits and # 3 when Niedermayer is tracking the opponent and curling up to hip him when Stevens comes freighting in to haul the trash out resembles best what happened last night.


Scotty Barbonus has Iginla in his sights and just as I was about to take him out, I switched over to Dance and Nemy laid him out.

Our netminder is none other than avid 2man blogger Mikey Heals playing with one hell of a color coordination. Undefeated in his first 5 starts with 2 shutouts and is looking strong. Mcgan is slightly in the points lead out of the gate with 17 in 5 games with Wendel 1 behind. It's a strong unit.

Man I hope Kovalchuk has 100 points. What a game winner last night. So good at hockey. Has everyone seen this because damn!




- Barbonus