Kamis, 26 Maret 2009

Kevyn Adams - Wow

I love YouTube because it’s great fun to get lost in its huge library searching for random videos. Sometimes you search for a Family Guy clip and 20 minutes later end up laughing at old bits from Sinbad. Yesterday I was eating a taco bowl watching Cam Neely highlights and ended up watching videos of different fly overs before sporting events. It was the sickest way to waste the lunch lull.

I don’t know how I found this next video. I think I was searching for “sick goal” and this was at the top of the list. I don’t remember seeing this before. Maybe it was because Kevyn Adams scored it and it was from way back when hockey was still broadcast on ESPN2. Not only is Melrose and Brian Engblom featured on the call but Brian Leetch (on the Rangers) gets the minus on the play. I’m guessing it was from 2002 because Mike Dunham (?) is in net and Adams poopies Boris Mironov (?) on the play. Who knows?

Watch the highlight and let’s go a bit further and break down this goal frame by frame.

Yeah, ridiculous.

I wish the replay was backed up a bit so we could see the play develop. But what we see is Adams come out of the corner with his head up looking for whoever that guy is in the high slot.

Who is that in the high slot? Bates Battaglia? Jeff Daniels? The Siberian Guard? Whoever he is he wasn’t getting the puck with Boris Mironov betwixt him and Adams. Adams has his head up the whole way so he knows what is at stake. Just like how I went to the deli and ordered my egg sandwich on white bread. The guy may have asked me twice if I ordered white bread because they only use white bread for French toast now that everyone is scared of refined foods and it is en vogue to go 7-grain or whole wheat but I knew what I wanted. My head was up I’m seeing the play develop and I know where I’m going with it.

But things change quickly in hockey and in life. Adams wanted to hit the shadowy figure in the high slot with a pass but that option was closed. I bet he looked to throw the puck in the crease for Rod the Bod to get a stick on but that option disappeared because Mironov closed the gap on him in a hurry. Once upon a time I went to a womens lacrosse party and wanted to hook up with a dark-haired girl with freckles and a healthy rack. I ended up spending the majority of the night talking with the blonde with strep throat. (Bressler left with some girl that night and ended up coming back out to the bar after. It was impressive.) Great trade for me. That blonde with the strep throat and I now live together. Be ready for change. As long as you have your head up and stay on the balls of your feet you’ll be in a position to win. To me, everything (wristshot, right cross, dancing, promotions etc.) comes down to footwork.

Check out the wide Neil Young rock stance Adams has when Mironov makes a break for him. Adams doesn’t have time to throw the puck to the net and who knows where his option is on the point. I bet Glen Wesley or Aaron Ward were sniffing glue but Adams pulls a superstar toe drag (Scotty tells me Roenick likes to call it a toe tuck. Do folks in Chicago call it a Taves tuck?) and undresses Mironov. It’s a good thing Mironov was not looking to get a piece of Adams otherwise I would have nothing to write about. Mironov played it soft and we have a chicken snap toey with the puck on Kevyn’s backhand at the right dot.

The Bod has set up shop in front of the net and the Helicopter Pilot from the Bond video game goes down low because that’s where the puck is going. He smells blood in the water and wants a crack at that rebound. The Bod is holding court and has Leetch’s undivided attention. Notice that Ward has now moved down to get involved in the play. Was he looking for a backdoor drop? Not happening. Ward is slow, well covered and Adams has top shelf toey on his mind.

So here we are. The prude in me says he needs hurry up and put the backhand low far side in hopes that Dunham kicks the rebound in front for the Bod to Hungry Hippo into his wheelhouse and pot top shelf. Video game Kevyn Adams would have taken it to his forehand and went near side top shelf but this is real life and that doesn’t happen to Kevyn Adams. It turns out Dunham is positioned funny (not that it mattered with this shot) and Adams somehow goes for the far side high. It’s unclear how Adams saw that this was where he was going to score. I think he was just trying to put something hard toward the net. Maybe he saw Dunham cheating to his left and some daylight? Who knows? If I tried this shot without looking I would have hit the Bod in his shorts and Petr Nedved would have scored on the transition. All I know is Adams really reaches back to crank this backhand and the end result is up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, b, a, start.

Bar and in.

Adams looked a little surprised that that the puck had eyes like that. He rattles of a great celebration and Carolina goes apeshit.

Let’s review:
1) Head up out of the corner
2) Plan for change; chicken snap toey around the Dman
3) Dial up a nasty backhand
4) Bar and in
5) Models, speedboats and fellatio

Has Adams scored since?


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