Kamis, 26 Maret 2009

Leonard and his hunt for value down the home stretch

Feeling a bit betwixt and confused after his sizeable loss in natural gas futures, Leonard found himself one morning on a dirty lenoleum floor with zero recollection of his indulgences the night before. As usual after accepting defeat in his investments, Leonard would often grab a Stone Temple Pilots album and head south to the heartland to imbibe unhealthy amounts of spirits with his comrade Camille.
Forgetting about a saddlebags investment in a commodity, they engaged in heated discussions about value down the stretch. Many names were thrown around. It was here, in these discussions about the game of hockey that Leonard would find himself. They came up with the following certainties, that seemed rational at the time, however we will look at them a bit closer now in a more sober light.

Obviously hilarity ensued when Bill Nertin was brought up because, well because Leonard found it funny to say Bill Nertin. They agreed that Owen Nolan was playing well leading the Gabby-less Wild down the stretch. With Gaborik back, they concluded that Andrew Brunette's value along with Owen would receive a boost. When Koivu returns, this team gets into the playoffs.
Weak and powerless Nemy. Buy the dips people!

Camille made mention of recent volume up in Toronto. Mikhail Grabovski and his recent stretch of 5 goals, 6 assists in the last 7 games. More room now for this guy up front with no Dominic Moore. Even CUJO was tossed around with Gerber attacking referees, you could squeeze some CuJo juice out over the next few if you need a keeper for the head to head playoffs or something. Poopy but you know!

Leonard made mention of Sam Gagner with 15 points in his last 11 games and Camille threw up all over Leonard's cousin Allan Marcus who happens to be a British Op in town for a convention. He wasn't amused yet Leonard wet himself over what had happened.
Leonard's cousin Allan on a "supposed" secret assasination mission in the Falkan Islands in December of '05.
They got a good laugh over Brad Richards and his return to the IR after a brief stint of action. Sometimes you have to just hang it up. Camille explained to Leonard that had he cut his losses in Natural Gas, he might still have the Porsche along with a higher end bottle of liquor but Leonard did not believe in an 8% sell rule and bet the farm at the wrong time.
Jason Williams, came up and his peppering gamelog over the last 15 games could be a hell of a lot worse. Probably available in every league and may provide hairline value down the stretch.
Don't you find it funny that Billy featured here from the movie Predator, along with Jesse the body and Arnold Sioux City Schwartz are all politically elevated individuals now. Yes this man is like a Senator or something now. Crazy!

Tomas Holmstrom is fully back now and they are playing the Islanders tomorrow night. That might be free points if you pick him up for the night and drop maybe Rich Peverley or something because people, stop with Rich Peverley.


The meeting down south with Camille brought comfort, solace, reassurance and one of the nastiest hang-overs ever for Leonard. Those hang-overs, when you get up and get a meatball sub from Subway and feel sooo much worse after. Than you hit the pipe and pass out from inability to exercise even the slightest hinting of a coherent thought.

In closing, Leonard met up with Bridget Moynahan on his private jet back to Heathrow and they discussed international intrigue and hairline encounters. That led them to some chilled Chardonnay which pointed them toward the bottle of Patrone in the Captain's lockbox which well, we all know how the remaining 2 hours of the flight were spent.


- Narzell ( A fly on the wall in Leonard's travels)

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