Jumat, 20 Februari 2009

Before you head to happy hour...

By the time you read this, I'll already be gone.

I'm catching an afternoon train down to Philly. 2Man friend and frequent commenter, Mr. W, is graciously putting me up for a booze filled weekend. He's got a couch for me to sleep on, tix for the Fylers/Pens and a tremendous thirst for 3 Olives vodka.


Random Mr. W story for you:


We are in college and doing a full ice flow drill where two players simultaneously skate out of opposite corners with a puck. Once they hit the opposite blueline they put a shot on net. Once the players shoot the next guy in line takes off down the ice for the blueline and the player that just shot has to get on his horse and backcheck.


Awful explanation I know but I've never told this story sober so bear with me.


W has just finished backchecking and gets in the back of line. Artem (2Man genius behind the camera) fires a shot that is waaay off target and drills W in the ankle. W is limping around and completely fired up at Artem. He picks up a puck at the hash marks and fires a slapper down the other end of the ice that hits Artem center mass in the chest. But here's the thing: Artem was in a moving line when he got hit. In fact, Artem wasn't even near the spot where he got hit when W fired the puck. He had just finished the drill when W shot.


W's shot was like a heat seeking missile on target for Artem's chest. Marine snipers couldn't have fired a better shot that W did that day.


I was right in front of W in line and as soon as I saw him take that slapper into a crowded line of his own teammates I rushed over to him. Being the captain of the team that year I was not about to let a guy endanger the rest of the team because he was pissed about taking a puck off the ankle. I was pissed and it was a bullshit thing to do during practice. When I got in W's face I was ready to kill him when I saw the shot pick Artem off from 190 feet away. How could I eat this kid's lunch when he just blew my mind. All I could scream at W was that it was "the best fucking shot I've ever seen in my life".


To this day that was the greatest athletic accomplishment I've seen in person. Ovy scores pretty goals but can he pick off a moving target from across the ice with a slapshot?


Anyways, we are NOT on the isles website this week due to some unforeseen circumstances. Hopefully we'll be back shooting our weekly show next time around.


Someone asked if we write the stuff we talk about. The answer is no. Scotty and I like to let things flow freely. Artem pushes for us to script the stuff we do but it doesn't feel right when we've tried. Besides we're not clever enough to write anything worthwhile anyways.


If you watch the weekly show you'll most likely see the 2nd or 3rd take of a segment. This happens because we'll start drifting out of control and off topic or I'll say something off color and we have to do the whole thing over again.


We really enjoy hosting that show and would sit there all day talking Islanders hockey if they let us but we get to talking and next thing you know Scotty is going off calling the guy from Fast & the Furious a cunt or something. We really should consider scripting it.


Of course you don't come around here looking for professional, polished hockey analysis. Everything we write or say is off the top of the head and rarely makes sense. Hopefully our love of the sport shines through and people can understand what we are trying to get across.


It's amateur hour here. Our only credentials include throwing up in the penalty box during a St. Patrick's Day tournament and playing rug hockey goalie with a Triple Fat Goose as a upper pads. Seriously. Bressler's prom date once asked him if he brought protection so he fucked her with Mike Peluso watching. We're total idiots but we live this shit and appreciate you reading along.


Enjoy Hockey Day in Canada. I'm going down for disaster day in Philly. Sunday Jaime Sifers and the Toronto Maple Leafs come to town to see if they can end Tom Renney's Ranger coaching career.


Have a great weekend, thanks for reading and that's not Billy Guerin down there. That's the money you could be saving with Geico.




-Nemmy

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