Crib Notes - Tampa Bay Lightning

Tampa bay Lightning
Finished last in the Southeast. Did not make the playoffs
Signed crafty F Alex Tanguay via free agency after it appeared every other team in the league passed on this guy.
Signed D Kurtis Foster and F Stephane Veilleux, both formerly of the Wild
Signed tough guy Todd Fedoruk
Made a sneaky splash signing D Mattias Ohlund.
Signed backup G Antero Nittymaki
Bought out Vinny Prospal who was signed by the Rangers
Radim Vrbata was traded back to Pheonix for David Hale.

Questions going into 2009-2010:
What is going on with the ownership?
Will we hear Vinny Lecavalier's name on the trading block again?
Will the team regret not moving Vinny to Montreal last season?
How is Mike Smith's concussion issues? (So far he's played well in 2 preseason games)
How much of an impact will Alex Tanguay have?

Poised for a breakout season:
Steve Stamkos had a strong 2nd half last season. I bet he blows up this year.

If you had to buy one Lightning sweater:
1) Do not buy a some ridiculous "Bolts" jersey
2) Try to spell Lecavalier correctly

Customized jersey I will buy Bressler for Hannukah:
Because NHL.com wouldn't let me put "Anal Beads" on the back.


Player whose game you like but are not sure why:
I am a Brandon Bochenski fan. For some reason I think he could be a legit player.

Rumor that I read on some website:
That Martin St. Louis was hung like a donkey. I can't find the source and I can't search for "Martin St. Louis cock" at work.

Old guys:
Marty St. Louis is 34
Jeff Halpern is 33

Young guys:
Last year's #2 pick Victor Hedman is 18
2008's #1 pick Steven Stamkos is 19

Tough guys:
Todd Fedoruk found a home in Tampa. Steve Downie is a thug and Ryan Malone is a salty irish guy.

Favorite old school Lightning:
Rob Zamuner

Favorite Lightning ice Girl:
Crystal is a 1st grade teacher. Imagine going to meet your kid's teacher and seeing this chick.

Goaltending coach:
Former Clarkson coach Cap Raeder

Nostalgia:
Look at the garbage Tampa bay drafted in 1992.
Roman Hamrlik, Drew Bannister, Brent Gretzky, Aaron Gavey, Brantt Myhres, Martin Tanguay, Derek Wilkinson, Dennis Maxwell, Andrew Kemper, Marc Tardif and Tom MacDonald.
Way to hit the ground running.

Interesting?:
Co-owners Len Barrie and Oren Koules can't get along and are both trying to buy each other out. Ridiculous situation in Tampa Bay.

NHL 94 players:
Brian Bradley, Chris Kontos and Mikael Andersson up front.
Bob Beers and Roman Hamrlik on D with Webdell Young in net.
Easily the worst roster in the league.

Prediction?
Another ugly season.

YouTube:
Scotty describes St. Louis's skating as "water bugging". It's perfect.


- Nemmy

What a game to fall asleep to in a snowstorm

Kiprusoff took the night off last night and gave up at the very least a game that should have been an overtime point. Got my fantasy team some much needed (Negative) points. Thanks Miika! Ahh ya can't get salty, he's put up an impressive '09 campaign thus far. Iginla with 5 points, recchi with 5 assists, Mikey Camma with a bunch along with Vinny and Marty St. Aggrippa chewin' up the line as well. You could just feel that game building with offensive energy as it went along.

When I see a box score like that one and you have most of the stars in one league or another from both teams involved, it's simply marvelloso. I see this when I see a box score like that one.

So the Dow Jones broke 7,000 and upside looks like me after a bottle of Cutty Sark so what we will do is take it slow out there because its wet and snowy here in NYC. So go home, get a quick pump in, crul up by the fire and watch the one game on tonight-bottom racing.com, Isles vs Avs and sip some hot cocoa.


Ahh...those were the days.
Great video find from 2man consultant Feign.

- Narnia

What you missed last night while you were resting your sprained ankle

In honor of "Brian Burke" being outed on twitter, all recaps will be 140 characters or less.

Flames beat the Blue Jackets, 4-1: when Iginla and Cammalleri both score the Flames are probably unbeatable

Canadiens shut-out the Canucks, 3-0: not only did Halak get the shut-out, he also should get credit for starting a goalie controversy reminiscent of any flyers team

Oiler beat the Lightning, 5-3: Stamkos' snipe was really really nice. Also I hope Vinny isn't hurt after taking that shot off the ankle.

Senators win over the Hurricanes, 4-2: Spezza must have taught Comrie the ol' fake slap shot down the wing freeze the goalie go wide and score move

Flyers beat the Capitals, 4-2: Carter had a goal and an assist, but he really had two assists if you count the pass he put on Ovy's tape in the first

Kings beat the Wild in the shoot-out, 2-1: not a real deserving win as the kings goal went in off a Wild player and then Doughty lost the puck five-hole in the shoot-out

Ducks beat the Sabres, 3-2: Even though the promos said otherwise, Ryan Miller did not play

Bruins win over the Panthers, 6-1: Byron Bitz... what a name!

Thrashers beat the Avalanche, 4-3: 2 of the 3 worst teams in the league in an empty arena. on ice that was ruined by the circus. no i did not watch

Blues beat the Coyotes, 2-1: Holy crap there were so many games on last night

Predators beat the Hawks, 5-3: is this the last one?

Blog Survey

A little while ago ESPN conducted an NHL player survey and blah blah blah you've probably read it already.

The only question that was really interesting was Question 3: IF YOU COULD CHANGE LIVES WITH ANOTHER PLAYER, WHO WOULD IT BE?

The NHL players surveyed picked Ovy. We are more interested in what our 6 readers have to say.

Below are the results of the ESPN survey in order of number of votes. We've included a short description of the players to get the thought process started. Don't feel limited by the players on this list. The entire league roster is up for debate.

Ovechkin - best player in the league

Lecavalier - set for life, 6'4 220lbs.

Sakic - unquestioned leader, Cup champion

Lidstrom - 4 Cups, bunch of Norris trophies, Swedish girls

Thornton - 6'4 230lbs+, gets to play in San Jose

Crosby - face of the NHL, really good at hockey

Mike Fisher - dates Carrie Underwood

Modano - American hero, married to Willa Ford

Chelios - still alive

Comrie - dates Hillary Duff

Iginla - probably has a bigger dick than you

Kovalev - "most talented", flies planes

Lundquist - cleans up in NYC, probably kills in Sweden

S. Niedermayer - 4 time Cup winner (?), perma-playoff beard

I don't know how to post an actual poll so leave a comment if you want to opine.

-Nemmy

What you misses last night because you were in Brooklyn... weird brooklyn

There were a ton of games last night and I was in Brooklyn "experiencing" Winter in Alaska - ok it was pretty fucking cool, but I did miss a lot of hockey. Again, I am thankful to my DVR and NHL on the Fly: Final.


Canucks finally win, beat the Hurricanes, 4-3: Mats Sundin actually participated in a positive manner with a wrap around goal, but it was Alex Burrows late third period shorthanded top shelf backhand game winner that got the W.

Canadiens beat the Penguins, 4-2: My favorite goal was Chris Higgins super fast shorthanded breakaway snap shot snipe.

Kings shut-out the Senators, 1-0: I imagine the suicide rate in Ottawa went up after this one.

Hawks beat the Oilers, 3-1: Do any goalies have black pads? I thin Huet, who was outstanding last night, would look more badass with black instead of red.

Stars win over the Flames, 3-1: The Avery addition by subtraction rule!

Panthers beat the Maple Leafs in OT, 4-3: Would the Leafs be a better team with a better goalie? It always appers like shots are just squeezing through Toskala - just like McCabe's OT blast. I predict they will overpay for a keeper this summer.

Thrashers beat the Rangers in the shoot-out 2-1: Things I didn't expect to see last night: The Sopranos cast at Grave's number retirement and Ilya Kovulchuk miss an open net.

Predators beat the Coyotes, 2-1: The Predators sneaky keep winning and might turn a profit this year. Wow!

Capitals win over the Devils, 5-2: Caps goal of the night: Mike Greens power play snipe - just a sick pass (from Semin), handle and shot. Devils goal of the night: Langenbruner's short handed breakaway - read Theodore's poke check and roofed the puck early.

Islanders beat the Lightning, 3-1: Vinny had a goal and a fight. Vinny being Vinny

Blues beat the Blue Jackets, 4-2: Rick Nash has sneaky speed.