All the way from Sty Town

So I went to play in Stuyvesant town last night for an hour. Great little 4 on 4 no goalie/puck/small net game. Nice guys and overall a great little week night skate. One of the 2 man's fellow defensemen Alex Kalaf showed up. Alex brings a good amount of scrape and scrap to a roller game or any hockey game for that matter. It's not that he is out to hurt you but he is out there to prevent you from moving around him with the puck. If you put the puck past him, he'll find a way to bring you down or separate you from the puck whether it be by legal or illegal means. Any respective bruiser d-man should and would do the same things. Sometimes he gets carried away but hey...what would life be if we never went over the line. Last night I was coming down on him and another old friend of mine on the left wing. I cut to the middle with the puck and Kalaf went to poke check me and his blade as often happens in roller took out my wheels and I went rolling to the floor.

Now here is the interesting part of the story. What usually happens in a situation like this is the biggest raspberry scrape on your knees or elbows or forearms. But I finalized the move last night. The golden roller parachute out of that situation. The thing is, you can't avoid spills and scrapes in roller it's part of the game. I slid out and I'm wearing a t-shirt WITH sleeves if you can believe it and shorts so I am open to attack of the raspberry. I moved my skates so the toes of my feet were on the ground, my gloves went down in a push up position to absorb the downward falling pressure and I slipped into a tuck and roll. It was sick and I was immediately in the back-check ahead of Kalaf. Really it was amazing and Nemy and Artem would have been on the floor laughing. It was soo much fun as I rolled out of this potential disaster. Not even a mark! Just roll with it folks. If you fight it, you'll get burned.

Thanks to W's for this Michal Barzus pic

Crib Notes - Boston Bruins

Boston Bruins
Last season - Finished 1st in the Northeast, Lost in round 2 of the playoffs to Carolina
Lost physical D Steve Montador to Buffalo via free agency
Lost physical D Shane Hnidy to Dallas via free agency
Lost veteran C Stephane Yelle to Carolina via free agency
Traded D Aaron Ward to Carolina for Pat Eaves (who was subsequently dropped)
Singed D Derek Morris with the money from the Ward salary dump
Signed rugged Steve Begin via free agency
Signed Andy Wozniewski - bottom story of the year
Resigned Vezina winner Timmy Thomas, David Krejci, Byron Bitz, and Mark Recchi.

Questions going into 2009-2010:
What the hell is happening with Phil Kessel's contract situation?
Can Peter Chiarelli trade resign Kessel by making room on the roster?
Can Tim Thomas possibly keep this level of play up?
Will this be the Michael Ryder letdown season?
Will injuries to Phil Kessel (shoulder) and David Krejci (hip) have any effect on this season?
Will Savard go Kill Bill on the league because he's pissed about the Canadian Olympic camp snub?
Can't the Bruins only decline from last year's regular season success?
Can Marco Sturm stay healthy and pot some goals so Bruins fans can feel somewhat ok about losing Jumbo?
How the hell are we going to get tix for the Winter Classic this year?
Who gets to Scott Walker first?

Poised for a breakout season:
Because I think David Krejci had a breakout season last year I'm going with Blake Wheeler. He was good in spots last season but will put it together in 2009-10.

If you had to buy one Bruins sweater:
My girlfriend wants a Chara sweater. Does it make me gay if I do her while she's wearing it?

Player whose game you sneaky like:
Marc Savard is pretty much hated by the rest of the league but you have to admit he dishes the puck as good as Adam Oates or Craig Janney ever did.
I'm a Bruins fan so I'll give you a player whose game I sneaky don't like: Phil Kessel. He's got a nasty release but is too soft in the corners and reaches too much.

If you name your children this they can only grow up to become hockey players:
Johnny Boychuk and Andy Bodnarchuk

Old guys:
Recchi is 41
Thomas is 35
Chara and Savard are 32

Young guys:
Lucic and Kessel are 21
Krejci and Wheeler are 23
Patrice Bergeron is 24.

Tough guys:
Lucic is an animal. Shawn Thornton polices.

Worst part about losing Shane Hnidy:
Not hearing super homer announcer Jack Edwards say "SHERIFF Shane Hnidy" at the top of his lungs.

Goaltending coach:
Bob Essensa


Nostalgia:
Cam Neely is in his 2nd year as Bruins Vice President

Interesting?:
The Bruins will unveil their new Winter Classic jersey next week.

NHL 94 players:
Oates, Neely, Joe Juneau up front - 1,000
Ray Bourque and Glen Wesley on D with Andy Moog in net.
Loved it when slow-ass Vladimir "Rosy" Ruzicka came off the bench.

YouTube:
Unbelievable short video about the Canadien/Bruin rivalry. I watched this 45 times today and I'm ready to roll.



- Nemmy

Crib Notes - New York Islanders

New York Islanders
Lost backup goaltender Yann Denis to New Jersey via free agency
Resigned Blake Comeau and Doug Weight
Signed both Dwayne Roloson and Martin Biron via free agency
Drafted John Tavares #1 overall at last year's draft

Questions going into 2009-2010:
Will the Isles get a new stadium built?
Is owner Charles Wang bluffing about moving the team?
Are John Tavares, Kyle Okposo and Josh Bailey enough to put bring fans back to Nassau Coliseum?
Will Rick DiPietro play this season?
If he is on his comeback schedule why did mgmt sign two potential starting goalies?
Can they do any worse than last season?
Will the Isles bring the 2Man back for another season of web video magic?

Poised for a breakout season:
Kyle Okposo was a bright spot last season. I expect this kid to make the a leap this year as long as he stays away from the bacon cheeseburgers.

If you had to buy one Islanders sweater:
Bress has a sick Pat LaFontaine throwback. Scotty has a few great ones including a dark blue Guerin and a (sleeveless?) pastel fisherman. I would get the blue throwback Weight jersey as soon as he gets named captain. I would tuck it into one side of my sweats and spend my day dangling.

Player whose game you sneaky like:
If I had a kid who was just starting to skate I would sit him down and make him watch every Richard Park shift. If the kid acted up I would make him watch the rest of the games as punishment.

Reason for jumping on the Islander bandwagon:
Team can't get any worse from here. Tavares, Okposo and Bailey will be future stars.

Reason for avoiding this bandwagon:
They might move once their lease is up. Kansas City Islanders? Queensboro Islanders?

Old guys:
Weight is 38
Park is 33
Andy Sutton and Brendan Witt are both 34
Dwayne Roloson is 39

Young guys:
Everyone else

Tough guys:
Joel "the Wrecker" Rechlicz, Jeremy Reich and Andy Sutton hit and fight. Hopefully Reich and the Wrecker make the squad.
Brendan Witt is old school.

Interesting?:
Fan favorite Tim Jackman was born in Minot, ND, the same town as Josh Duhamel, the guy from Transformers who is dating/married to Fergie.

Sneaky cool part of last year's training camp for the 2Man:
Nursing a hangover in the rink and having Eric Cairns come sit next to us to ask us about our night. All Scotty wanted to do was say, "who cares what bar we ended up at! Tell us about beating up Shayne Corson"

Nostalgia:
Garth Snow is the GM, Bryan Trottier, Ken Morrow, Dean Chynoweth, Mike Dunham, Eric Carins, and Steve Webb all have various roles in the organization. Somehow Scott Lachance is a scout for the Devils.

NHL 94 players:
Pierre Turgeon, Benoit Hogue and Steve Thomas up front
Vladimir Malakhov and Darius Kasparaitis on D and Glenn Healy in net.
David Volek was rated a 60 while his helmet tallied a 98.

YouTube:
The single greatest interview icebreaker in the history of tv. Seriously, the next time you are nervous at an interview or something just imagine your future boss hatching out of a garbage can.



- Nemmy

Crib Notes - New York Rangers

New York Rangers
Last season - 4th in the Atlantic, Collapsed in round 1 vs. the Capitals
Lost tough guy Colton Orr to Toronto via free agency
Lost Freddy Sjostrom to Calgary via free agency
Lost rentals Derek Morris and Nik Antropov to Boston and Atlanta, respectively. Not sure the Rangers even wanted these guys back.
Lost Paul Mara to Montreal via free agency
Traded Scott Gomez and some cats and dogs for Chris Higgins and change
Signed Donald Brashear to replace Colton Orr
Signed Ales Kotalik to replace Nik Zherdev (who was let go and has yet to sign with a team)
Signed Vinny Prospal and re-signed Ryan Callahan
Signed Marian Gaborik with the money saved from trading Scott Gomez.
Let Markus Naslund and Lauri Korpikoski go.

Questions going into 2009-2010:
How many games will oft-injured Marian Gaborik play?
Can Henrik Lundquist's keep this team in playoff contention even with a weak defense?
How will the team respond to a full season under John Tortorella?
Does the rest of the league realize that they can torch Hank Lundquist's glove hand by now?
Will Hobey winner Matt Gilroy and former 1st rounder Bobby Sanguinetti help the thin defense? What will happen to Brandon Dubinsky? Is he singed for 2009-10?
Which high-priced player gets booed in MSG first - Kotalik, Rosival, Redden, Drury or Gaborik?

Poised for a breakout season:
Chris Higgins. He's a Long Island native and NYC will love his game. 30 goals this year.

I'm sure he's a great guy but:
Joe Micheletti is a dreadful color analyst. Keeping him around is the worst mistake MSG has made since they stopped serving Bud Ice.

If you had to buy one Ranger sweater:
Blue Drury. It tells people that you are pretty reliable and always in a position to win.
I think Scotty found a white, misspelled, Straka jersey in his apartment this summer. I may have dreamed this.
I know his gf's parents bought him an Avery jersey for Christmas because they knew that he was a big hockey fan. They're from Kentucky so it was a good try and a nice thought.

Is this former Ranger Ron Duguay or rocker Jon Bon Jovi?



Player whose game you sneaky like:
Donald Brashear has a pretty good shot when he gets it off and has more a better stick than your typical tough guy. Plus he's a top 3 heavyweight.

Something that only interests me and a few others:
Roster hopeful Dane Byers is cousins with former Bruin badass Lyndon Byers

Old guys:
Brashear is 37
Prospal is 34
Drury is 33
Redden is 32
The "Potvin Sucks" cheer should have died 15 years ago.

Young guys:
Dubi is 23
Marc Staal is 22

Tough guys:
Avery plays tough, Higgins and Callahan finish checks, Voros is scrappy and Brashear is a beast.

Interesting:
The Rangers practice facility keeps cups full of cough drops on the bench because Jagr used to like to eat them while skating.

Nostalgia:
Either chubby Chris Drury pitching Trumbell, CT to a LLWS title or the 2Man interviewing Patty Riss in a bathroom.

NHL 94 players:
Messier, Gartner and Tikkanen starting up front. Beezer in net.
Brian Leetch rated 76 was a crime.

YouTube:
Our Penguin Ulf tries to steal a broken Lundquist stick and gets in trouble with Aaron Voros.


- Nemmy

Crib Notes - Philadelphia Flyers

I'm going cover all 30 teams. Aggressive? Not really. No information in these crib notes is new or useful.



Philidelphia Flyers
Last season - 3rd in the Atlantic, Lost to eventual Cup winner, Pittsburgh in round 1of the playoffs
Lost steady winger, Mike Knuble to Washington via free agency
Lost Andrew Alberts to Carolina via free agency - whatever
Lost goalies Marty Biron and Antero Niittymaki to NYI and Tampa, respectively, via free agency - this must have felt like finally passing a kidney stone
Acquired oft-injured O-K Tollefsen from Columbus via free agency
Signed Ray Emery from some garbage squad in the KHL
Traded Joffrey Lupul, Luca Sbisa and 2 1st round draft picks for 6'6 215 lbs. of pure aggression in Chris Pronger

Questions going into 2009-2010:
Is the Brian Boucher and Ray Emery combo really an improvement from the Biron and Niittymaki duo?
How long before Ray Emery fights in and/or shows up late to practice?
Will Daniel Briere stay healthy enough to help this squad past the first round?
Is Simon Gagne's groin tweak at the Canadian Olympic camp anything to worry about?
Will Scott Hartnell cut that ridiculous head of hair?
How many suspensions will this team accrue with full seasons from Pronger and Carcillo?
How long can Philly go without striking gold with a goalie prospect? Hasn't every other NHL team drafted and developed a strong netminder except Philly?
On paper doesn't this roster look like a serious contender?

Questions after 2008-2009:
Didn't it feel like Biron and Niittymaki were always good at the same time or bad at the same time?

Poised for a breakout season:
Claude Giroux. Young guy was strong against Pittsburgh last playoffs.

Dodgy math:
Coming up with Scott Hartnell



If you had to buy one Philly sweater:
Mike Richards is the obvious choice. I'm not tough enough to wear a Cote or a Laperriere and I can't wear a Briere because I have a set of balls.
If you want to get a throwback go with a Kjell Samuelsson.

Player whose game you sneaky like:
I've said it before but if Scott Hartnell is on your favorite team he automatically becomes your boy.

Player on the Philadelphia Eagles roster with no soul:
Mike Vick - tortured and killed animals.

Old guys:
Ian Laperriere is 35 but still plays like Rambo
Pronger and Timonen are 34

Young guys:
Carter, Carcillo, Richards, Powe, Coburn and Carle are 24.
Claude Giroux is only 21.

Tough guys:
Pretty much everyone other than Briere and Gagne.
Cote is the heavyweight but takes more headshots than John Kennedy Jr.

Interesting:
Arron Asham once spent a total of 15 minutes at an Ace Bailey Children's Foundation function in Brooklyn. He signed 3 autographs and ducked an interview request by the 2Man while Adam graves spent 2 hours on the ice handing out trophies. Not our first snub but come, Aaron.

Nostalgia:
Seeing a skater with the name "Parent" on the Flyers throwback 3rd jersey in 2009.

NHL 94 players:
Lindros, Recchi and Rod the Bod started up front. Hard to believe that the one guy not still playing is Lindros.
Dmitri Yushkevich on D and Tommy Soderstrom in net. Dave Brown was rated a 35.

YouTube:
Dave Poulin rips one top shelf on Mario Gosselin shorthanded. Is that Tim Kerr coming over for a hug? What a crowd.



- Nemmy

Crib Notes - New Jersey Devils

I'm going cover all 30 teams. Aggressive? Not really. No information in these crib notes is new or useful.



New Jersey Devils
Last season - 1st in the Atlantic, Lost a heartbreaking 1st round series to Carolina in 7 games.
Lost defensive center, John Madden to Chicago via free agency
Lost backup goaltender (who held the fort down for a good chunk of last season), Scott Clemmensen to Florida via free agency
Lost tough guy Mike Rupp to Pittsburgh via free agency
Lost center Brian Gionta to Montreal via free agency - biggest move for the team
Signed backup goalie (who sneaky had a strong end to last season for the Islanders), Yann Denis as a free agent
Resigned - Johnny Oduya, Andy Greene, Travis Zajac, and Brendan Shanahan

Questions going into 2009-2010:
Will the Canadian Olympic camp mean that Marty finally shows up Devils camp in decent shape?
How much will they miss Brian Gionta?
Does Shanny have anything left in the tank?
How come the Devils can't sign free agents?
Will Jacques Lemaire bring back some Cup magic from 94-95?
At what point in the season will Lou Lamoriello fire Lemaire and put himself behind the bench?
How many Affliction t-shirts will I see down in Point Pleasant this weekend?

Poised for a breakout season:
Zach Parise picks up where he left off last year and puts up a mastodon-like 100+ season.

Guys on roster that I can't tell apart:
John Oduya and Bryce Salvador



If you had to buy one NJD sweater:
Grab a David Clarkson red jersey. If you don't have to pay by the letter try and fit Letourneau-Leblond on the back.

Player whose game you sneaky like:
No sneaky here. Zach Parise is an American hero. We're looking for him to be a rainmaker in Vancouver.

Players on the roster who sound best through a greasy Jersey accent:
"JP's kid, Zach Pareeezy"
"Johnny Orrduya"

Old guys:
This is a pretty old team
Shanny is 40
Marty is 37
Brian Rolston is 36
Jamie Langenbrunner is 34. I keep forgetting that he has been around for so long.

Young guys:
Travis Zajac is 24, Parise is 25 and the rest of the team is kind of old.

Tough guys:
Pierre-Luc Letourneau-Leblond (despite having a name like a movie jewel theif) is a beast.
David Clarkson hits, fights and wants to take sean Avery's head off.

Interesting:
Marty and Sheldon Souray are co-owners of a pizza joint in Montreal called "La Pizzeria Etc."
New Jersey has more diners than any other state.

Nostalgia:
Did I mention that Jacques Lemaire is back behind the bench?

NHL 94 players:
Alexander Semak as starting C
Chris Terreri in net
Scott Stevens and Slava Fetisov on D
Billy Guerin was rated a 49 that year.

YouTube:
Parise's top 5 goals from last season. The shootout goal nearly knocked me off my chair. Sick.


- Nemmy

Crib Notes - Pittsburgh Penguins

I'm going to cover 30 teams in 30 days. Aggressive? Not really. No information in these crib notes is new or useful.

First up - the Pittsburgh Penguins



Last season
2nd in the Atlantic, won the Cup

Offseason
Lost Rob Scuderi - who was a dman's dman (including a few butterfly saves in the Finals) to LA via free agency
Lost Hall Gill who was a dman's potato salad to Montreal via free agency
Signed backup G Brent Johnson, defensive rock, Jay McKee, and tough guy Mike Rupp
Re-upped Billy Guerin for another season - Maybe the best move of the summer.

Questions going into 2009-2010:
Can they repeat?
Is Serg Gonchar healthy again?
Can Sid and Malkin top last year's totals?
Has anyone ever seen a baby pigeon in NYC?
Having lost Ryan Whitney (at the deadline), Scuderi and Gill (in the offseason)is this the D corp of a repeat winner?

Poised for a breakout season:
Alex Goligoski playing full seasons with the club.

Guy on roster who most closely resembles Manny Pacquiao:
Casey Pierro-Zabotel


Guy on roster whose nose most closely resembles Patrick Ewing's:
Tyler Kennedy


If you had to buy one Pens sweater:
Black Billy Guerin or Billy Guerin Black/Billy Black Guerin. Powder blue and Billy Guerin don't go together.

Player whose game you sneaky like:
Jordan Staal. Your friends say that if his last name was Brown he'd be making the league minimum. Overpaid or not he gets shit done.

Old guys:
Bill Guerin had so much white in his beard last post season.
If I told you that Sergei Gonchar is 35 years old would it sneaky surprise you?

Young guys:
Almost everyone else.
BTW Sid and Malkin are 22 and 23 years old, respectively. Jesus

Tough guys:
Paul Bissionnette lights up the AHL and Eric Godard is a top 3 tough guy in the NHL.
Kennedy, Kunitz and Cooke aren't big but are consistently physical.

Interesting:
Much-travelled Craig Adams. Born in Brunei Darussalam (somewhere in SE Asia) but reared in Calgary. 4-year player at Harvard, last ever draft pick of the Whale.

Nostalgia:
This is the Igloo's (Mellon Arena) last season. The new Consol Energy Center is scheduled to open for the 2010-11 season.

NHL 94 names
Starting D of Ulf Sauelsson and Larry Murphy

Youtube video:
Bill Guerin with the kids.


- Nemmy