Yeah

The Price is Right Losing Horns sound bite  The Price is Right sound bites

- Nemmy

Chalk Talk

Pretty sick way to finish off the Rangers in OT, right? Let's break down the goal (because I have nothing to write about) and parse what happened in this play. Keep in mind I can't spell Dustin's last name without Google's help so I'll refer to him as "Buff".



So we're in OT with plenty of skating room and Marc Staal find himself with some pressure from Andy Ladd (at least I think it's Ladd). Staal does his best to use the net and get's some space from the aggressive forecheck and hoofs it out of the zone up the right side.



Rozsival (at the end of his shift) offers a very weak outlet for Staal considering it's a 4-4, right? I think he was just looking to have the puck carried out so he could get a blow. Anyways Staal gets to the nuetral zone and hits Gabby cross ice who is waiting at the blueline.

Rozsival goes for a line change and Gilroy hits the ice. This is important but in the grand scheme of things might not have changed the end result. So I guess it isn't important but noteworthy. Roll the film.



Gabby steps into the zone unmolested and sets up camp. Staal, being the Dman he is, goes right to the net as Gabby looks for an outlet pass.



Since Rozsival changed Gabby doesn't yet have defenseman at the top of the zone to he feigns making a cross ice pass (unless I imagined this) and sends it to Staal down low.

Now Staal is a defenseman and most Dmen think that their offensive roles when not on the point is to get some traffic and look for a tip. No way another forward makes that play. Dmen are mostly meaty folks who try for steak and potato jobs. Gabby's pass wasn't nearly hard enough for Staal to try a between the legs tip but by chance the puck squirts to Vinny Prospal.



Prospal has a chance here. He's lefty and has been lucky enough that everytime Gabby has breathed on him he's been scoring. So even though Staal tried his hardest to end this play the puck gets on his stick.

When you look at the picture above you think Vinny could easily throw something on net for a Staal rebound or slide it to Staal for the finish. Wrong. Duncan Keith doesn't freak out and kicks Prospal's pass attempt out of the reach of Prospal.



Now Gilroy still isn't in this play. I thought he was an ultra-mobile dman? How slow was Rozsival getting to the bench? Buff is looking at the puck like he stares at a Sonic commericial and Gabby doesn't know whether to engage or let Gilroy play his man. Gabby gives a half-hearted sweep and it's a race to the bottom.



Buff turns on the jets. Not only that but in the above picture Buff pulls a little toey and catches Gilroy flat footed. Once Gilroy tries to pokecheck he is finished. Buff is churning and Gilroy should have got on his horse and forced Buff wide. Instead he made a play for the puck and gets sent down to the AHL.



Gilroy does his best Mike Green impression and reaches for his inhaler when physical defensive play is involed. He lunges one last time like a hipster running after a Brooklyn bound L leaving 3rd avenue. Now if Gabby were a dman he would have beaten Buff to the post to make the stop. Instead he acts like anyone would if they saw a sofa flying past them and maintains his distance. Buff gets in on Henrik who has a dog collar shock him if he steps out of his crease.



Henrik does 35% of a poke and Buff slides the puck through his legs. It's tough for Hank with Buff coming left to right with all that speed but Hank still wishes he had committed to the poke check.



It's a walkoff.

In hindsight Gabby should have tried to skate through 4 Blackhawks and get a quality shot on net. That's really all the Rangers have right now.

- Nemmy - horseshit since 1981

Brendan Witt

New York Islanders defenceman Brendan Witt was hit by a car in Philadelphia on Tuesday, according to Newsday. But Witt reportedly picked himself up off the road and, after a few profanities, assured everyone he was all right before continuing on his way, prompting one witness to say, "it was like seeing Clint Eastwood, but in hockey."
Witt was crossing Arch Street to get a cup of coffee when a gold Yukon truck made an illegal turn and hit the 34-year-old. Newsday says Witt tried to jump on the hood of the vehicle before being thrown to the ground as he was struck.
"I'm okay," Witt told the crowd as he dusted himself off, according to Newsday. "I've got to go play some hockey. I'm a hockey player. I'm okay. No big deal." "Boy that guy is tough," added the same witness, one of many who saw the event occur.
But the 6'2, 219-pound blueliner downplayed the incident.
"I just got lucky," said Witt, who oddly enough had declined an offer for a drive to Wachovia Center from the team's medical staff just prior to the accident. "Fortunately nothing bad happened. I'm just a little sore."
The Humboldt, Saskatchewan native chose not to call police or get medical care, and played in Tuesday night's 6-2 loss to the Flyers.

Witt is a maniac

By the way someone in one of my leagues is trying to justify trading Frolik and poopy Vanek straight up for Kovalchuk. And the counter party in the league remains quiet and why of course would you make that trade in the first place. You can't trade 2 dimes for a quarter ya know?

Witt is an animal. He gave us the best on ice look at camp two years ago. Than he taped up Nemy to a chair and carried him off. We'll air that one day.

- Pancho Barilla

What you missed last night while you were dissecting Teen Wolf

Canadiens beat the Senators, 4-1: Is Alexei Kovalev even dressing for the Senators? He was a guy you couldn't miss last year. The power play ran through him and now, I don't even know if he's out there.

Predators beat the Canucks, 4-2: Martin Erat is probably the most underrated player of the decade. Ok, maybe not, but for 7th round pick, he quietly picks up around 50 points a year since the 2001 season.

Flyers beat the Islanders, 6-2: As usual, the cure for an ailing team is to play the Islanders.

Ducks come back to beat the Stars, 4-3 in OT: Neither goaltender was particularly good in this game, but Turco was worse because he got the loss. Also he did one of those things where he saved the breakaway but than slid into the net anyway for a goal.

What you missed last night when you were attacked by a rabid racoon in central park

Devils shut-out the Sabres, 3-0: Marty ties Sawchuk. Impressive, but I'm sure someone somewhere is trying to argue that most of his shut-outs are the result of "trap hockey." Whoever that is... shut up.

Canadiens beat the Flyers, 3-1: Braydon Coburn made a very unorthodox play on a 2-on-1 that led to the eventual game winner. As Maxim Lapierre was skating down the right wing with the puck, Coburn dove at him at the top of the circle. Lapierre simply, toe dragged around the flying d-man and then fed a pass to Cammalleri who easily scored. Usually the d-man dive might occur lower in the zone, when the forward with the puck has run out of space, but Coburn decided to try something new for his new coach and it failed, spectacurlarly.

Oilers beat the Panthers in the shoot-out, 3-2: As I watched this game, I saw all the empty seats in Florida and really tried to think about how you would sell this game (this particular game) to Floridians. Do they even know where Edmonton is? Is there even anyone on the Oilers you could sell this game around?

Kings beat the Flames, 2-1: Jonathon Quick made some stellar saves and the Kings won an old-school game last night. Scott Parse (who?) scored a high-light reel goal on Kipper when he cut in from the left and some how found the space to tuck a backhand in on the far side.

Maple Leafs beat the Thrashers, 5-2: I have no idea if the Leafs are good now or improving or if Toskala just got repeatedly lucky.

Coyotes shut-out the Wild, 2-0: Something about watching Coyotes home games is depressing. I think its the bad lighting in their arena.

Avalanche shut-out the Blues, 4-0: Peter Budaj is a great backup, but seemingly cannot play more than 3 games in a row.

Capitals shut-out the Lightning, 3-0: Ovy's back and scores 2. Thanks for the rest, NHL. Is he still on pace for 50 in 50?

Hurricanes beat the Penguins, 3-2: Why wasn't Tim Gleason ready for the fight will Bill Guerin? They were lined up next to each other and off the draw Billy drops the mitts, but Gleason plays the puck and its embarrassing and then Billy kind of got beat up a bit.

Bertuzzi

Your boy is -7 in 29 games for Detroit. Production isn't great either (4 G, 9 A). Not moving the feet or getting to the net. Just not making it happen.

What you missed this past weekend

Thank you Nemy for finding this and putting this in my life because if he hadn't, I never would have known that Guerin did this ridiculous pose in a pic.

This is all you missed this weekend so get some.

Great seats at the Ranger game last night...me and Nemy were cashew nuts on a super sunday night. I'm tired today and the game was very uneventful except for the 5 minute 5 on 5 powerplay that Zetterberg, Datsyuk, Holmstrom, Rafalski and Lidstrom had. It was truly great to watch even though they didn't score.


Msgless Scotty