1,000

It’s Thursday. We’ve almost made it to the weekend. I haven’t said an intelligent thing since February 21st of last year. I have a Mike Green streak going with retarded hockey-related babble. If you must read this, please make sure you get leave it in the stall for the next guy.

All this talk about steroids and whenever a hockey head is asked about possible cheaters in the NHL they say “it’s not part of our culture”. Are you sure? I realize that NHLers are very different from other pro athletes in a myriad of ways but I wouldn’t be shocked to learn that a few guys were shooting up. The signs won’t be as obvious as seeing Brady Anderson hit 50 homers out of nowhere but maybe some guys are coming back from injury a little faster because of some banned meds. I’m not saying I know anything but let’s not fool ourselves into thinking it’s not possible in the NHL.

Not to make light of domestic abuse (I did that yesterday) but the following is a list of NHLers that Chris Brown could beat up right now:
1) Alexander Semin
2) Valtteri Filppula

Don’t try to defend Semin. Half of the Islanders Ice Girls would eat him up. And I can talk shit all I want because I’m a beastmaster. My grandfather was Tully Blanchard and I put Myoplex in my cocopuffs. I've been working out with Artem and we benched so much I can't get my hands closer than the caps lock and L key.

I would like to do a show where we have players talk about their tattoos. I found this picture of Scott Parker the other day noticed his sleeve. We talked about ink with Aaron Voros briefly and wanted to talk with Colton Orr but we were too afraid. I’m not sure how I came across a Scott Parker picture or why I was searching him.

Not hockey related but the SI swimsuit issue covergirl has so much extra sideboob it’s not even funny. It’s like right-to-left there’s so much extra boob there.

Also, why do they keep putting the skin painting photos on the pages with the staples? Such garbage.

Also, my buddy sent me a youtube of Salma Hayek breast feeding a random African baby. I don’t know the context of the video but it looks like she just picks up a baby and throws a nipple in its mouth. Seriously, that kid is one of the luckier African kids in the league next to whichever kid gets bought by Angelina Jolie. By the way have you been keeping up with the size of Salma Hayek’s chest lately? There’s a lot of nourishment there. That baby got breast fed on Tuesday and is now on a roster in the WHL.

It would be nice to see the Bruins pick up a defensive body for the playoff campaign but I would feel ill if they gave up one of their younger guys to rent a Chris Pronger or Jay Boumeester. I think Boston has the roster right now (assuming Ryder’s face heals) to make a serious serious run but they have the tendency to go flaccid late in games. In the loss to San Jose the other night Boston didn’t bring the puck past the San Jose hash marks in the first 15 minutes of the 3rd period. Lucic’s 2 goals came from unleashing hell in the offensive zone and late in the game the Bs were turning the puck over at the San Jose blue line. Another body won’t cure that lazy attitude. I know it must sound stupid to complain about a team as successful as Boston has been this year but these are the problems that will keep a good regular season team from moving forward in the playoffs.

Also, Phil Kessel is missing at least 2 gears since coming back from mono. The extra step that used to back defensemen up isn’t there right now and he’s lost his fastball with the toey-snap shot through the defensmen’s legs.

Kyle Okposo is a beast. His confidence is sky high right now. His goal last night and his missed SO attempt vs. LA are just the beginning. Watch the interview we do with him, Comeau and the Truth and watch how I dominate him with my dinner order. He wasn't thinking cheeseburger until I came around. Seriously, Myoplex in my cocopuffs, bodies in bags.



Interesting argument brought up by Mr. W. Which young-ish duo would you rather have on your team right now? I am going off of the top of my head so if I missed some guys forgive me.

Elias/Parise
Richards/Carter
Sid/Malkin
Okposo/Bailey
Kessel/Krejci (Lucic?)
Price/Komisarek
Vanek/Roy
Kane/Toews
Ovy/Green (Backstrom?)
Nash/Mason
Doughty/Quick (Kopitar?)
Perry/Getzlaf
Mueller/Boedker (eh)
Stastny/Mcleod

Am I leaving anyone out?

Soft quarter for Glatfelter (Ticker: GLT). Tim eto get back to work. Wipe until it’s white.

-Nemmy